Friday, April 30, 2021

Astonishingly Amazing April

I thought April would be a chill month where I could rest and recuperate. Turned out to be a very, very busy month! The good thing about it I end the month on a good note. I was able to do 5k+ steps today! The last time I was able to do that was in early February. 


That's a big deal for me because my average step count was only 2k per day at the beginning of the month. I used to average 6 to 8 thousand a day when I used to go to the office. At least 10k when I travel. It's been hard for me because I feel like I'm always carrying a heavy backpack uphill. That's why I walk very slow. 

I'm getting a bit more clarity now on what I'm going through. I did a number of tests in the last two weeks. It's been exhausting, but at least I'll soon find out what can be done to improve my quality of life. In the meantime I still need to stay home to rest and recover. 

Happy to end the month on a good note. Changing my mindset to improve at least 1% a day helped a lot. I spent a lot of time praying and focusing on where I want to be. Circumstances also forced me to strive harder, but I've been reminded to take it slowly. 

With faith, things can only get better :)

CB///Yr2/20  #StuckAtHomeDay/Yr2/47 #StayHome #BeKind  

Thursday, April 29, 2021

Donut Fail - #SpreadTheHappiness

There's a #spreadthehappiness thing going on in FB the past couple of days. Friends have been posting this request -

Joining the bandwagon donut flop please. If you’re reading this, even if we barely talk, please tell me a memory you have of me that makes you smile inside. Afterward, you can make this your status. You’ll be surprised by the memories people hold of you. Life is hard especially during times like this. So #spreadthehappiness


I've been answering some I come across because I know happy memories help a lot during this time. We've been confined at home so there's been no opportunity to make new memories. I did a similar happiness project last year. Friends started to share photos with their memories. I thought it would be a great idea to create a photobook out of it. 


Whenever I feel blue I just open the photobook and go through the happy memories my friends shared to me. It always gives me a warm, fuzzy feeling :)

CB///Yr2/19  #StuckAtHomeDay/Yr2/46 #StayHome #BeKind  



Wednesday, April 28, 2021

Guess What's Back

One of my favorite things to do before was listen to the radio. I got this hobby from my parents who used to listen to their favorite station. If you're from the same generation you probably listened also to this radio show every Friday.


One of the Philippines' most popular radio shows is back! Lovenotes by Joe d Mango! Last night while looking through YouTube, Sweetie found this video by Joe d Mango announcing the return of Lovenotes


It was surreal to hear Joe d Mango's voice again. Apparently he left radio 14 years ago and moved to Canberra (source). I guess he'll be posting new episodes on his YouTube channel. He has some videos from 5 years ago and we listened to one episode. We couldn't help but chuckle at the episode. I guess because we're older and experienced now. 

Well, we hope he'll continue with the plan to post new episodes. He did mention you can send in your love problems to an email address (it's mentioned in the vid). 

Would you listen to Joe d' Mango again? 

CB///Yr2/18  #StuckAtHomeDay/Yr2/45 #StayHome #BeKind  

Tuesday, April 27, 2021

Hidden Angels

The past few days have been difficult for me. I've been worrying about what the medtech told me after my scan. I wish she didn't say anything to me since it just left me anxious. My Kuya says that it is dangerous to entertain ideas of the worst things that may happen to you. If you think something bad will happen to you, it may happen because you entertained it. 


My doctors have always been careful about giving a diagnosis. They know I'm a fighter and they'd rather I focus my time on getting better than worrying about what could happen. It took me days to shake off the worry (also the reason why I've been so lazy to write). My doctor today reminded me that I'm a trooper. I've been through so many humps in the road and I would manage this beautifully. 

And God always sends angels to help you along the way. I re-read the message of one of my high school classmates today. It was a good reminder to focus on what I want my future self to be. A prayer was answered yesterday by another angel to proceed with what I want to do. I'm grateful for the angels that come into my life unexpectedly. 

CB///Yr2/17  #StuckAtHomeDay/Yr2/44 #StayHome #BeKind  



Monday, April 26, 2021

My Last Physio Day

It was my last session today with my physiotherapist. It's a super sad day for me because Wendy took good care of me since I started seeing her. She's shown genuine care for me and made sure that I had the appropriate exercise I could manage. 


I believe she's one of the angels that's been sent for me. She's going back home this weekend and I hope she'd be able to accomplish what she's set out to do back home. I have to wait for my consultation with my doctor on Wednesday to know whether I should continue my PT. In the meantime I'll do the exercises on my own for now. 

Farewell Wendy, I hope to see you in the mountains when the pandemic is over :)

CB///Yr2/16  #StuckAtHomeDay/Yr2/43 #StayHome #BeKind  

Sunday, April 25, 2021

Sundays

Sundays will always be family days. I remember when I was a child we'd hear mass on Sundays. My Dad would always buy me ice cream after hearing mass. Then we'd go home for lunch. Things changed when I became active in our church and our choir would serve on Saturdays and Sundays. My family expanded then and we'd spend weekends together. 


I super miss my choir family. In the last decade I've only been able to see them sparingly. Last time I saw them was in 2019. We had a get-together at my Mom's place and I surprised Papa Ray when I flew in to be in his birthday party. 

Things have changed so much. Most of us have our own families. A number of us moved to other countries. Some are still back home, still serving. I look forward to the day I could go back home and continue serving. And I look forward to the day we can all be together again just like old times. 

CB///Yr2/15  #StuckAtHomeDay/Yr2/42 #StayHome #BeKind  


Saturday, April 24, 2021

Time Machine

Would you go on a time machine to go back to the past to change a choice you made?

I was watching an episode of Orange is the New Black last night. Lolly Whitehill was building a time machine. When she walked out from the gathering inmate counselor found her inside the time machine she was building. Lolly explained she wanted to go back in time to change some decisions made by government. They went on to talk about what they would do if they could go back in time. 

Would you go on a time machine? I was fascinated with Back to the Future when I was a child. I watched it again and again on VHS. It was interesting to think about going back in time to change choices you make. I never gave much thought about it for my own life, but more for history. It was only last night I asked myself, "What would I change if I could go back in time?"

For selfish reasons I think what I would just change would be those times I got sick and how I handled it. That was what immediately came to my mind last night because of the coming bad results of my scan. I'm bracing myself for the worst. I know though I should focus my time on praying for the best. 

I wouldn't have worried about it, but I felt quite concerned when the medtech told me it's not looking good, God bless you (and I don't think she's Catholic). My selfish reason is I want to grow old with my family. 

I'll probably be this antsy until I see and talk to my doctor next week. In the meantime, I'll focus on looking at the future when I'm old and gray with my family. I'm looking forward to tbe day when we could all go to the beach again, eat bottomless sushi and ravish many pots of spaghetti. 


CB///Yr2/14  #StuckAtHomeDay/Yr2/41 #StayHome #BeKind  


Friday, April 23, 2021

Dawn

Woke up early today for an appointment. Peeked out the window and saw dawn breaking. It was a beautiful sight. 



What's your favorite time of the day? I wish I could wake up this early every day to see this beautiful sight.

CB///Yr2/13  #StuckAtHomeDay/Yr2/40 #StayHome #BeKind  

Thursday, April 22, 2021

Stop the Rush

The nausea is finally gone. I'm not sure what happened, but I suspect the new medication may have interacted with my maintenance. I listened to my body and just rested all day. I'm glad I'm stable since I have to do a scan today and tomorrow to determine treatment. 

Cars rushing around in Rome. This was the first time I saw St. Peter's Basilica.


It took me 18 days to finish my quilt project. It's a cover for my food processor. I took my time to finish the project because I injured my finger a few weeks ago while making a bag. I really take my time when I make my quilt projects. 

I realized my life now is so different from a few months ago. I was always rushing back then to finish many things. I was a master multi-tasker. I enjoyed being productive and accomplishing things that could help. Eventually it was too much for me and my doctors ordered me to slow down, stay offline and rest. 

I took months for me to accept my new pace. I pressured myself to get back up immediately. It didn't happen. When I finally accepted that this is my new normal I learned to stop rushing. When I quilt I relish every stitch that goes into my project. I spend time admiring the trees outside our home. I watch planes pass by through the clouds. I am grateful for every breath I take. 

Honestly I cannot imagine going back to the life I had before I got sick. I am where God wants me to be. And today I ask you, my friend, "Are you too busy? Do you still have time to smell the flowers?" Stop the rush. Relax and enjoy everything God provides for us. 

CB///Yr2/12  #StuckAtHomeDay/Yr2/39 #StayHome #BeKind  

Wednesday, April 21, 2021

It's a Bad Day

Hope you had a better day my friends. I've not been feeling well all day and will just continue resting. 

Tuesday, April 20, 2021

Finding Joy

Sweetie's back at work which means I'm left by myself during the day. I actually enjoy being alone. It gives me time to recharge and do things I like. My siblings were already teenagers when I was born so my Mom taught me how to keep busy. That's how I got into crafting. 

Joy because I rode a new car! It smelled so good and uncle was really nice too.


It took me awhile to transition from my busy work lifestyle to my now slowed down lifestyle. The transition was terrible since I'm used to multitasking multitasks. It took time for me to accept the fact that my tank was empty and it's going to take a long time to fill up again. 

Honestly it's been only two weeks since I accepted that I need a long break. I'm at peace with it now. I woke up full of gratitude today. I kept waking up last night, but I still woke up happy. I think it's because I now easily find joy in the littlest of things. 

I'm happy because I had a great PT session yesterday. It makes me deliriously happy when my physiotherapist says we did a lot and I did well. I'm happy because someone pointed out to me that it's great I'm able to help back home in my own little way. I'm happy because I'm almost done with my food processor quilt cover project. I'm happy because Sweetie's lemon ginger tea cured my achy pointy finger. I'm happy because Miggy's been able to expand his cooking prowess. And so much more. 

I know it's very hard to find joy at this time. There's so much going on in the world. Headlines make me mad and exasperated. I watched Fr. Jerry Orbos, SVD and Bo Sanchez' conversation today and Fr. Jerry shared how he overcame cancer. He said, "Don't focus on the tumor, focus on the humor." He explained that God is bigger than anything, even this virus. Just focus on Jesus and we will overcome all of this. 

Don't worry my friend, we'll all be alright. 

CB///Yr2/10  #StuckAtHomeDay/Yr2/37 #StayHome #BeKind  

Monday, April 19, 2021

Are You at Peace?

"A light heart lives long." - William Shakespeare

Do you sleep well at night? I used to have a hard time sleeping. I tried many tactics to put myself to sleep. The most effective way for me is the 4-7-4 breathing technique. Lately I just lie down, say my prayers and I immediately drift off to sleep. 


I normally start my day now with some spiritual input while eating breakfast. I started doing this in early March. It's made my days more peaceful. This morning I listened to Fr. Jerry Orbos, SVD's reflection on "Matters of the heart. Do not nurture hurt. Life is too short for negative feelings". I like listening to Fr. Jerry because his reflections are very practical and he has a nice sense of humor. 

He asked the question, "Are you at peace?" In his reflection he reminds us to leave all our problems to God. In the last few months I've had a lot of bad days which kept me up at night. The best advise I got from my doctors was to stay offline. It effectively quieted me down and led me to the path of peace. 

Are you at peace my friend? Just lift everything up to Him. 

CB///Yr2/9  #StuckAtHomeDay/Yr2/36 #StayHome #BeKind  

Sunday, April 18, 2021

Step by Step by Faith

"Step by step, a little at a time" has been my mantra the past few weeks. Things got better when I shifted my perspective. Instead of pressuring myself to get better immediately, I aim to get better at least 1% everyday. I also go to my doctor when I need to, I don't wait for things to get worse before I go.

And guess what, I finally have some progress. The asthma attacks dwindled away. It only gets triggered now when the air quality goes bad. My body is now used to the meds and my doctor removed one medication. I finally lost some weight. I'm able to do some chores at home. Most importantly, I can walk 3k steps a day again. 

I have an important test to do this week. The test is meant to determine what kind of treatment I should do. It will also tell me how I could get better. There's a lot of considerations to make to see how I could really progress. I'm just grateful that my long-time cardiologist really cares about me. He took the initiative to send me to an expert since I'm a complicated case. 

Have a blessed Sunday everyone!

"Rejoice in hope, endure in affliction, persevere in prayer." Romans 12:12

CB///Yr2/8  #StuckAtHomeDay/Yr2/35 #StayHome #BeKind  

Saturday, April 17, 2021

Yoda Love

My Yoda collection has grown in the last couple of months. They don't fit the shelf anymore.  Thanks to Sweetie and friends who have been indulging me I now have huge Baby Yoda toys too. 

Passed by a favorite toy store and noticed that the life-size Yoda on display was gone. Someone must have finally bought it. It was around SG$3k! Ended up entering the store because Sweetie saw a new hooded Yoda Funko Pop. 


As I walked around the shop I saw a new Yoda statue. It's huge! Bigger than the life-size Yoda statue in SFO and the Sandcrawler. It made my day :)

What about you? What do you collect?

CB///Yr2/7  #StuckAtHomeDay/Yr2/34 #StayHome #BeKind  

Friday, April 16, 2021

How I Got Into Tech

I cannot really claim that I'm a "techie" person. I can get around stuff mostly because of curiosity. When I get stuck I get help. I didn't really plan to get in the tech industry. My path just naturally led to it. 

This looks a lot like the computer I inherited from my Kuya.


I was 10 years old the first time I got my hands on a computer. My Kuya enrolled me in logo programming summer class. Kuya also took the pains to teach me how to use a computer. Eventually I inherited his old computer. It was fascinating too for me. I used it mostly as a tool for writing, designing posters and publishing*.

When Mom got into exporting I discovered Dreamweaver. From my publishing skills I learned how to create a website. Then I played around with promoting the website on the web. What got me really fascinated about how the web would work for businesses was a class I took when I was taking my MBA.

My professor had us read Tim Berners-Lee book "Weaving the Web: The Original Design and Ultimate Destiny of the World Wide Web". 

I was excited to use all my learnings. My destiny was reset when I botched an interview at a premium furniture company. My dream then was to become a product manager. I overprepared for my next interview which was at a startup**. I got the job and that's how I got into tech. I just realized it's been 20 years since I went on this journey. 

I'm on sabbatical now that's why I've been thinking about where it all started. I think it's important to look back as you plan for your future. I've been spending some of my time uploading old photos. It's been a good way for me to remember where I've been. I hope it will help me determine where I want to be. 

*I was part of our university literary folio and newspaper.

**They weren't called startups back then.

CB///Yr2/6  #StuckAtHomeDay/Yr2/33 #StayHome #BeKind  

Thursday, April 15, 2021

How My Future was Shaped at 17

When I was 17 I was working on my thesis for my political science degree. Together with my groupmates we did a study on the mobilizational capabilities of the sangguniang kabataan. The study allowed me to get to know my home city better. For many months we hopped from one barangay to another to interview SK officials. 

With my thesismates, Alan and Jingo.


With Jingo at our uni.
I was fascinated with how things worked. After interviewing many SK chairs and councilors I was inspired and wanted to contribute back to my community. I told myself I'd like to become mayor of my city by the age of 30. 

Elections were coming up at that time and I was invited to run for SK chair of our barangay. My Dad was excited and supportive, but my Mom said no. It was the same no she told my Dad when he was invited to run for congress. Mom didn't want us to get involved in politics for many reasons. 

Looking back it was a good decision to follow my Mom's wishes. I wouldn't have survived or as my Mom says I'd probably get killed sooner or later. We can contribute anyway through other means. For now I've revived our Paranaque Life blog to help our neighbors find information about living in our city. 

CB///Yr2/5  #StuckAtHomeDay/Yr2/32 #StayHome #BeKind  

Wednesday, April 14, 2021

Listen to Your Body

I've been sleeping a lot since we got home from the hospital. I just felt exhausted. My doctor told me to rest more so that's what I've been doing. I asked my doctor yesterday how come I was able to power through the illnesses I had in the past. I've been doing what I've been told to do, but I'm not going back to normal. He explained to me that I've run out of gas. I've put the needs of others ahead of me and that's why my tank is empty.

My impatient old self was super freaked out about this dilemma, but I've come to accept that things need to change. That's my new reality and I have to be practical about how I deal with it. What about you? Do listen to what your body is telling you. Don't push too hard. Make sure you're heart is always happy. 

Listen to your body my friend.

CB///Yr2/4  #StuckAtHomeDay/Yr2/31 #StayHome #BeKind 

Tuesday, April 13, 2021

Sweetie's Home!


He's home! Sweetie's home! Yay! I'm so happy Sweetie was discharged today. I'm so thankful that it didn't escalate to anything serious. He's okay now and will just be taking some more rest. Thanks to everyone who prayed for us. <3

CB///Yr2/3  #StuckAtHomeDay/Yr2/30 #StayHome #BeKind 

Monday, April 12, 2021

Relax


We're always in a constant state of stress. I'm still on medical leave because I'm still facing a lot of physical stress (especially now that the haze is back again!). There's stress brought about work, family issues, the environment and what's happening in the world. It's exhausting. 

Relax, Papa God has your back. Just pray. 

CB///Yr2/2  #StuckAtHomeDay/Yr2/29 #StayHome #BeKind 

Sunday, April 11, 2021

Sunday with Sweetie


Spent the day with Sweetie at the hospital. He's now free from the wires and can walk around the room. We spent the afternoon on the couch watching videos. He'll be coming home soon :)

CB///Yr2/1  #StuckAtHomeDay/Yr2/28 #StayHome #BeKind 

Saturday, April 10, 2021

Courage

I'm not used to being alone at home. I'm used to traveling and being away, but I'm never really left alone at home. Sweetie is still at the hospital. I hope they'll discharge him tomorrow. 

I couldn't help but be teary eyed when I left him at the hospital. He looked so forlorn because he's not used to being the patient. I'm usually the patient. He was so rattled yesterday I had to keep telling him that everything will be okay. I must admit I was a bit scared also, but I had to be courageous for both of us. 

I gave Sweetie tips on how to survive his stay at the ICU. Luckily the nurses taking care of him were the same nurses who took care of me -- mostly Filipino! I also told him that it's a good sign when the doctor does not see you right after a test is done. Usually if they do a test on you and it's followed by a visit from the doctor or instructions for more medication, it may mean you're not stable. 

So luckily Sweetie was moved to the ward today. We're just waiting for the doctor to explain why his BP shot up. Hopefully it will just require some meds and a lifestyle adjustment (okay, no more grilled liempo!). 

Can't wait for Sweetie to be back home! I shall use his pillows for now hrhrhr. 

CB///365  #StuckAtHomeDay/Yr2/28 #StayHome #BeKind 


Friday, April 9, 2021

The Unknown

My day started with a call from my doctor's secretary to let me know that they were in process of reviewing my scans. After that I went on my usual routine. Breakfast, drink my medications and I usually read after breakfast. I skipped reading to take care of some documents for my doctor. 

Things drastically changed by noon. I had an emergency to attend to. Good thing it's a good day for me and I was able to provide the support Sweetie needed. I'm back home now and just resting. We were not expecting what happened today. It made me realize that you can never predict what could happen in a day. 

The unknown can be a scary thing. It can make you panic. Good thing my Mom taught me how not to panic during stressful situations. My Mom's secret? Praying and trusting God. That's what I held onto throughout the ordeal I've gone through in the last few months. It's what I'm clinging to now that we're going through another bump in the road. 

CB///364  #StuckAtHomeDay/Yr2/27 #StayHome #BeKind

Thursday, April 8, 2021

The Millennial Mindset

I have a whole bunch of nephews and nieces who are in their 20s and early 30s. All of them were born between 1987 to 1996 and they fall under generation Y. The millennial generation. Well, Miguel falls under this generation too. 

They're all grown-up now. 


I know there's been a lot of grumbling about the millennial generation. They do things very differently. One thing I noticed is their ability to simply do what they want. One example I can think of is choosing your college degree. In my generation what you take up in university is largely influenced by your parents. Shifting courses or even schools wasn't the norm. 

I tried the GenX way with Miguel. It didn't work. He shifted courses and schools several times before he finished his studies. The same happened with my nephews and nieces. After graduation most of them did not want to have a full-time job (with exception to the doctor and teachers in the fam). The idea drove me crazy. 

I couldn't fathom the idea of hopping from one gig to another to earn a living. Growing up I learned to follow the normal process of graduating and finding a good job to sustain your needs. Take vacations and breaks when you have time. My millennial fam though, they work and do everything they like doing while earning a living. And I could see they're happier. 

As I journey to fulfill my quest to financial freedom, I realized that the millennial mindset of enjoying life while earning makes a lot of sense. It honestly took me two years to understand this. One of my nieces actually became a millionaire in her mid-20s. In my mid-20s I didn't even have any savings. 

So that's how I finally understood a bit about how my millennial family does things. I've been warning my friends who have younger kids to expect that they'd be doing things very differently. As a GenX parent to a millennial, ahhh it will really drive you crazy haha. 

CB///363  #StuckAtHomeDay/Yr2/26 #StayHome #BeKind   

Wednesday, April 7, 2021

Virtual Walk Through My Childhood

Last night I chanced upon a vlog of someone who walked through our village. It was a one-hour video of her just walking through the streets. I was fascinated since it's been over a year since I've been home. It was like seeing my home with a fresh eyes. 

Photo by Kuya June <3


The video was long, but I ended up watching it. I bored Sweetie with my commentary haha. I pointed out memorable places, homes of my friends/Titos/Titas, areas where it usually floods, history of the houses, homes we visited for caroling etc. I was surprised to see many new houses and renovated houses. There were very few empty lots left. 

The most exciting part for me was when she walked through our street. She even stopped to take a close-up of my neighbors flowers. I immediately pinged my friend the link to the video. She's in the US now and I'm sure she misses her home too. I appreciate the effort of the vlogger who walked through our village because it reminded me of many happy childhood memories. 

I went to sleep dreaming of the day I can come back home. The video made me realize that everyday things will always be there and we take it for granted. If you ask me I'd still want to live in the village where I grew up. Perhaps I can find a smaller home where we can live. I hope it can just be a stones throw away from where my Mom lives. 

Thank you Kuya June for lending your photo for my blog post.

CB///362  #StuckAtHomeDay/Yr2/25 #StayHome #BeKind   


Tuesday, April 6, 2021

Taking Chances

Circa October 2007
The other day I saw a video message I sent to Sweetie back in 2007. I made a video 3 weeks after we became a couple. It was a short message thanking him for loving me. Sweetie and I became best friends before we became a couple. When he asked permission to court me I just said yes. I thought it would be so awkward for us to go through the ligaw stage, so I just said yes. 

I sent the video to Sweetie last night. He had a huge smile on his face after watching it. The road to Sweetie was riddled with a lot of wrong turns and potholes. It took me years to heal from my last relationship before I took the chance again. After many, many years God finally answered my prayer for the right person for me. 

Finding the video was a good reminder for me that God answers prayers in His time. It took 15 years before that prayer was answered. And God did find the right person for me. I can just imagine how hard it is for Sweetie to take care of me. My prayer now is to get better so I can take care of him and Miggy too.

So how did I know he was the one? I just knew and took the chance to love and be loved. 

“I tell you, whatever you ask in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours” (Matthew 11:24).

CB///361  #StuckAtHomeDay/Yr2/24 #StayHome #BeKind   


Ligaw - courtship

Monday, April 5, 2021

Let's Dream Again

It's Monday again! Start of a new week! I know I sounded so morose the last few days. I told myself I will focus on looking into the future this week. I have to anchor myself on where I want to be. That should help with my recovery. 

Over a decade ago someone told me, "You're not a dreamer. Wala kang pangarap." I fell quiet after he said that. Of course I vehemently denied it and told him I wouldn't be where I am if I did not have a dream. Honestly, I'm a very practical person. I take things one day at a time. I also only take calculated risks. I've been like that since I had Miggy. 

I realized all of this when I took a break in late 2019. I took baby steps at looking at my future. My plans though were foiled because of the pandemic. So I made a new wishlist and did most of it. I'm now letting myself look where I want to be in the next year, five years and 10 years from now. I'm creating a dream list. 

On top of that list is a proper home where my family will be complete. We have a tiny home in Manila, but I want to have a home with enough space. And in that home I want to have a craft room! Sweetie will probably want a man-cave too. I also want to have space where I can plant food. I wish though we could still have our cleaner who comes in once a week haha. 

So that's where I am for now. I tend to work out the practicalities in my mind when I think of my dreams. I should probably sit down make a proper list without thinking of practical matters. 

What about you? What's your dream?

“I tell you, whatever you ask in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours” (Matthew 11:24).

CB///360  #StuckAtHomeDay/Yr2/23 #StayHome #BeKind    

Sunday, April 4, 2021

Live for Love

Happy Easter everyone! 

This is the second Easter I'm celebrating far away from my family. Good thing technology now allows us to keep in touch with each other easily. It's been a very long, strange journey for all of us. We each have had to carry our crosses. We each bear it differently. 

I normally do a Lenten sacrifice. The harder ones I did was when I gave up soda and milk tea. I didn't do one this year because I'm already carrying a heavy cross - my medical condition. Instead of abstaining from something I instead nourished my spirit. 

Knowing God loves me makes me unafraid. That's how I've been able to bear my cross. I am grateful for my family and friends who continue to pray for me and provide me counsel.

May you have a blessed Easter my friend. 



CB///359  #StuckAtHomeDay/Yr2/22 #StayHome #BeKind   

Saturday, April 3, 2021

Surrender Your Suffering

This week has been challenging. I was sent to see a new doctor to review my case. She found the issue on why my recovery is slow. The news was overwhelming. The frustration bubbled up again and for a few days I just coasted along. I needed time to wrap my head around the news. 

To keep myself productive I worked on uploading old photos. It helped calm me down. I saw photos of me traveling a lot. It was six years before I had heart surgery. I had an action filled life. I adjusted my lifestyle post-heart surgery. It wasn't action-filled, but it was still adventurous.

I've been forced to slow down for a couple of months now. I thought I'd be back in action by now. I have to sit and wait a few more weeks to know what we can do moving forward. I was overwhelmed for a few days. When that happens I become unproductive. I hopped from one task to another without finishing anything. 

Eventually I realized how I continued to live an action-filled, adventurous life despite all my medical conditions. I always surrendered everything to God. I let Him navigate my life. The forced slow-down the past few months has been a prolonged delay to re-calibrate me. 

Just trust in Him.

"I have accepted fear as part of life - specifically the fear of change... I have gone ahead despite the pounding in the heart that says: turn back..." - Erica Jong

CB///358  #StuckAtHomeDay/Yr2/21 #StayHome #BeKind   

Friday, April 2, 2021

Good Friday 2021 - God Loves You


I watched the 7 Last Words via Feast TV this afternoon. The 7 last words reminds us that God loves us. The reflections shared by the priests and the lay people were testaments to God's love for us. If you are going through something, fear not, pray, have faith. God will always love you. 

CB///357  #StuckAtHomeDay/Yr2/20 #StayHome #BeKind   

Thursday, April 1, 2021

Maundy Thursday 2021

A blessed Maundy Thursday! 

I have mass livestream and visita Iglesia info here if you need it.

CB///356  #StuckAtHomeDay/Yr2/19 #StayHome #BeKind