2025's Lessons

2025 was a year of healing for me. My inner child finally healed from many years of pain.

I prayed for healing for many years. Well, I learned a lot last year and that's what helped me heal. 

Here's a few things 2025 taught me:

1. I learned from reading that the only one who can heal your inner child is yourself. Let your older self talk to your younger self to let go.

2. A heart that can't forgive won't heal.

3. Protect your peace. Sometimes the best thing to do is to just step away.

4. Red flags are real. Don't be too trusting.

5. Old friendships can be re-ignited. Sometimes life just gets in the way and you eventually go back to where you were at the right time.

Life was never meant to be complicated, live simply.

#BeKind #StaySafe

What I Learned from Being a Fan Girl at a Young Age

I was probably about 10 years old when I went Gaga over Menudo. My favorites were Robbie Rosa and Ricky Martin. My Dad bought a cassette tape. I think it was my second casette tape after the Michael Jackson one my Dad bought for me.

Anyway, I drove everyone crazy since I listened to the tape day and night. Eventually, my Dad got us tickets to watch a concert at the Folk Arts Theater. He even got me a poster and a magazine. I got to watch another concert. Kuya got us front row seats! He was then courting Ate Joy. I was soon happy and one of the boys even winked at me. Haha!

Using BSB concert photo since I don't have any photos from the 80s concert 

Anyway, I eventually moved on to other things. After Menudo, I kept myself from fangirling another group. I felt silly for spending a lot of my time daydreaming about the group. It also dawned on me that none of my daydreams would come true. 

After that I realized that the best way to admire performers and entertainers is to do it from a distance. Enjoy their performance for what it is and draw inspiration when warranted.

Artists share their craft because it is their gift and talent. Focus on that and just shrug your shoulders if there is gossip about them. Don't judge since you don't really know what's behind the story. Best you can do is pray for them.

#BeKind #KeepSafe

Shared Crosses

Late again to post today. I had thought about this topic a week ago. I didn't want the post to become a sob story so I waited until I had better inspiration. 

We all bear crosses. It's different from person to person. My most obvious cross is my health. I carry other cross which I carry with my family. It was pointed out to me a week ago that there are crosses that you share with others. The pain you carry is also shared and understood by someone else. 

I strangely found comfort in that because for so many years I thought I was alone in it. I wasn't and knowing that someone shared the cross with me made carrying it lighter. I also know people are praying for me to bear it better. 

The inspiration today came from someone I just met. If my disabilities are invisible, his is very obvious. He told us about how he powered on when he was a student forced by a professor to go up 8 flights of stairs to attend class. He had to crawl up since the lift (elevator) in their building was oftentimes busted (and once for 2 straight months). His other professors would not require him to be physically in classes, but one pushed him and would mark him absent if he couldn't get to class. 

I could still go up a flight of stairs, but I would be short of breath by the time I reached the top. Him? He had to crawl up because of his disability. He put his mind towards finishing his studies and that's how I eventually met him many years later because I need his services. 

Seeing how he carried his cross like a champion was inspiring to me. It reminded me of the passage, "None of the trials which have come upon you is more than a human being can stand. You can trust that God will not let you be put to the test beyond your strength, but with any trial will also provide a way out by enabling you to put up with it." (1 Corinthians 10:13)

God will only give you trials that you can bear. Look up, have faith and He's got your back. 

#BeKind #StaySafe

Faith

Watched Gary V's interview with Ogie Diaz the other day. What struck me is how Gary V must have suffered through the years because of diabetes. He also mentioned he had kidney issues and had several operations. 

He had always been Mr. Pure Energy for me. Even with the medical issues he still performed really well. It never crossed my mind that even while performing he has to be mindful of his stability. During the interview he told Ogie Diaz that his wife brings everything he may need. She has his meds, emergency food and other items that can be used to stabilize him. 

Gary V also mentioned that there is always a medic around when he performs. He said he tells them that he hopes they're just there to watch and not have an emergency. The most important message though he said in the interview is even with all the precautions, his safe space is God. 

I completely agree with him. I have chronic issues also and there are days when I become unstable. My doctor told me I'm lucky I don't need to use supplemental oxygen to walk around. I shared this with my former PT and she said I'm lucky because I have a strong mind. 

I think it's faith. My will to live is strong because I want to make more happy memories with my family. My will is strong because I have faith. And like Gary V, Papa God is my safe space.

Happy Sunday everyone!

#BeKind #StaySafe

Frustration

 "I will remember my covenant between me and you." Genesis 9:15

I must admit I'm not great at managing frustration. I get all worked up especially if it involves paying for something. The past few weeks have been really challenging. Found out our sockets weren't put back properly. The piano guy overcharged us and hasn't finished his job (excuses the past 3 months). Pest control company told me we owe them money when in fact we overpaid because of their confusing statement of accounts. Waiting for a document for over a month now. Found out my Mom's garden is turning brown because the helper hasn't been watering the grass and plants.

I have reached out and requested for help/clarification nicely. Followed up nicely. And followed up more, firmly and nicely. I know I could sound super sungit so I asked help from Sweetie to follow up. He got frustrated too, haha. 

Patience is a virtue and I was reminded today by Didache that God keeps His promises. Humans are humans and I just need to remind myself that things will eventually be resolved. I've nicely asked for clarification and help and I have to stay calm because getting worked up will stress me out. I would end up getting sick (I'm already having tension headaches). I already vented my frustration and came up with a spreadsheet to help one of our suppliers. I just hope and pray something will move. 

In the bright side, a friend is surprising me with an unexpected gift! It will hopefully arrive in a few weeks! :)

#BeKind #StaySafe

Contentment

"I know indeed how to live in humble circumstances; I know also how to live with abundance. In every circumstance and in all things I have learned the secret of being well fed and of going hungry, of living in abundance and of being in need."

- Philippians 4:12

I've been told once that I didn't have dreams. I told the person that if I didn't have dreams, then perhaps I wouldn't have pursued working for a global company. Back then my goals were very simple. Give Miggy the best life and eventually find my one true love. I also eventually wanted to have my own car and house. 

I guess I've always just been content with what I have and never really dreamed of extravagant things. My parents never spoiled me and Kuya taught me to be practical. I choose things based on function and comfort, not on brand or what's trending. It takes me at least 2 years to buy a device/appliance, or I only replace it if something is not working. 

I remember my parents also taught me the Filipino saying, "Hangga't makitid ang kumot, matutong mamaluktot."* It is really best to live below your means. No sense in being buried in debt just to acquire something that you want. I learned that the hard way when I paid my grad school tuition with my credit card. I only got lucky when Titay gave me money to pay it because she was able to collect a loan. After that I learned and never used my card for something I couldn't really pay in full when the bill comes. 

I'm especially more careful now that I am retired. I'm lucky because my boys seem content to just stay home with me. We're so busy at home, oftentimes the day isn't enough to do things we like doing. Be content and be happy. Just always believe that Papa God will provide you with everything.

Have a blessed Sunday my friend. 

*If your blanket is too short, bend your legs so it fits you."

Sui Generis

I just learned this term from GodWhispers. Sui Generis means "of it's own kind" or simple put, "unique". God created each one of us to be unique. Several of my doctors have told me this (actually all). I once was surprised to get so many nurses and medical students visit me after heart surgery. Word got out I was unique. They all wanted to see my veins, haha. 

I didn't mind. Who knows it may help them be more knowledgeable about people like me. It's sometimes hard though since I have many limitations because of my medical conditions. Very few people understand that my endurance isn't the same as normal people. Nor the fact that I am immuno-compromised. I do have friends though who always test themselves before meeting up with me. That I really appreciate. 

We also have our unique talents and you will be able to use it properly when you ask God to navigate your life. At some point in my life I was very confused on what path to take. After a lot of heartbreak, I gave up and asked God to navigate my life. He immediately did and nudged me in the right direction. My life improved and I became happier. I even found the right one (Sweetie). I feel I was also able to use my God-given talents the way it was supposed to be used. 

Now, I'm retired. Most of the people my age are still very busy with their careers and raising a family. I guess that was the reason why I started things early. The most I can do now is share my learnings and experiences through my blog. I tried pushing myself to do the things I used to do, but it was frustrating. Took me a long time to accept that my reality is different now and God has put me in a very different path. 

September was very different from the previous months. I'm working on improving my endurance and stamina. Went on a meal plan to improve my nutrition. Also started pulmo rehab. The effects are starting to show. I'm hoping and praying that things improve in the coming months. Here's my September 2023, one second everyday compilation.

https://youtu.be/6B2TOj2abD8

#BeKind #StaySafe

Will AI Outdate You?

There's been so much news about artificial intelligence (AI) the past few months because of ChatGPT. Some are excited about it, some skeptical, some worried and some just don't care about the hullabaloo. 

Outside the tech industry there's been much talk about it because of plagiarism. Students have been caught having their homework done by AI. I have a friend who caught two job applicants who submitted AI written essays. That's the "popular" way so far of using AI, but it's actually been integrated already in many of the things we are using/experiencing, ie automated traffic lights, magic eraser on Google Photos, self driving cars etc. 

My career focused on introducing technology to the masses since I graduated. I was always challenged to think about how to introduce new things to the market. From what I experienced in the last 25+ years, there are new things that the market easily adopts to and there are things that are just really hard to integrate. 

There's still so much that tech has to do to really define how their product will be useful for our everyday lives. I read an article that it could also disrupt  white collared jobs. I immediately thought about the work I used to do. I was a program manager and what I did changed almost everyday, so I think my job would have been safe from AI but probably from the randomness of getting laid off. Well, I've retired and that's something I don't need to worry about.

Adoption of new technologies takes years and will never reach 100%. If you look back at history, the introduction of machines was a major disruption. The market adjusted and other types of jobs were created. What I think big tech should think about is how to use AI for good because it's the best way to use something powerful.

#BeKind #StaySafe

Home on Mondays: Planning for Old Age

Our parents are now in their 80s. Both of them insist to live independently. Both of them still live in the homes where they brought us up. Now that we also live in a house I realized how hard it must be for them. There's a gazillion things to do at home everyday and I'm amazed at how they've kept things in sync. 

Well, my Mom always have helpers. She has people who come to service stuff when needed, i.e. gardeners. From her I learned to have a list of reliable suppliers to come, i.e. pest control. It's lot of work to manage a household and I've been managing Mom's house the past few months too. She's still fiercely independent and she wants to live in her house. 

I realized that one should have an "exit plan" when you grow old. I've been thinking about this a lot since my doctor said I'm trapped in a 70 year old body. There's a lot of things I can't do anymore, so I told Miggy when the time comes when we can't manage to live in a bigger house he should move us to a smaller house or the condo. 

There's many reasons why you should downsize at a certain point in your life. First of all, managing a bigger house requires you to have good financial resources. This is why you should have a good retirement plan so you don't become a burden to your children. Secondly, your nest will probably be empty. Your children will have their own lives and their own homes. 

Third, you won't have the same energy as your younger years. Fourth, your old home will require a lot of repairs. Electrical and plumbing fittings only last up to 50 years and will need a full change. Your old home will also likely require pest control and many things won't be working anymore. Fifth, with your family far away they will likely worry a lot about you. 

Old house being demolished.

I have many elderly neighbors and all of them are empty nesters. They've been a support network to each other which is good. I went back to my old neighborhood precisely for that reason. I wanted to be closer to family and be surrounded by friends. Being in a familiar place also helps me cope in managing our homes better. On the other hand though, the children of some neighbors who have passed on have sold their childhood homes. 

I have seen some homes torn down and replaced with modern homes (I live in one). There's a lot of construction going on at our village. I grew up here and the landscape has definitely changed. A friend observed also that "old guards" are gone and a new generation is managing things. I told him that's the cycle of life that's why it's important to discuss your old age plan with your kids. I've already had it with Miggy so he'll know what to do and he won't have a hard time figuring things out.  

#BeKind #StaySafe

Home in Mondays: Must-have First Aid Kit

I had a sad birthday. My boys did all they can to cheer me up yesterday. Surprise after surprise came. I was ecstatic about it, but deep down I just felt broken. 

The past few months have really been challenging health-wise. I have been able to do less and less activities and that really frustrates me a lot. I started to be able to do more activities again after we got back from Bohol, but COVID-19 hit our family. I probably had it too, but with less viral load. I fought it so I could take care of my boys. Then air quality went bad and things have been downhill.

The struggle is real and yesterday I finally gave in and cried. I felt so helpless and hopeless. Aside from feeling unwell the help I'm supposed to be getting hasn't come. I've also been feeling down because I haven't been able to see my Mom. 

Sweetie though reminded me that I should not worry too much. He reminded me how strong I am and told me how proud he was I was able to help edit a book for Mama Mary despite everything. That made me calm down because it reminded me what I should hold on to whenever I face challenges, my faith. 

The first aid kit for anything is your faith. You can add a prayer book or stampitas, a rosary, Holy Water and a medallion too. What's most important is your relationship with Papa God. 

Build your spiritual first aid kit because you need to have it anywhere you go. 

#BeKind #StaySafe

Forgiveness is No Substitute for Justice

We went around our neighborhood to spin somme Pokestops earlier. We usually go around the park since there are a number of Pokestops in the area.  We usually stop and park where the stops are reachable and I saw a gate that had a message on the gate -

The house looked like it was being renovated. It probably had building materials inside, but no one was there to keep the place secure. Well, that was the main reason why we lived in a condo for a long time. We traveled a lot and could just easily lock up our place and leave. We decided to move to a house mainly because of the pandemic. We felt it would be safer for us to live in a detached house, plus we rarely go out nowadays. 

Stealing IS a mortal sin. Last night I watched a video on PTSD. The doctor explained that PTSD is caused by experiences that are usually disastrous and something very hard to comprehend. It is that inability to deal with the matter that triggers the stress. It happens because the event is something that does not adhere to your values or what is normal. 

The past few weeks have been very difficult for me. I told Sweetie last night that May 9 triggered my PTSD. I was already able to manage other issues, but May 9 was just really incomprehensible for me. I've been avoiding watching and reading the news because it stresses me out. When I get stressed, I get sick. Sweetie told me maybe I could train myself again so I could cope better. 

That made me get to the bottom of why its triggering my PTSD. Stealing is a mortal sin. It is one of the ten commandments and certainly an important value for me. Managing the issue of my Mom's helper and May 9 stems from the same belief that's been attacked. I think we can all agree that it is a painful experience when someone steals from you. It's been incomprehensible for me since it was done by a person we trusted for many years. And the circumstances surrounding May 9 is also incomprehensible. 

"Forgiveness is no substitute for justice." - Pope Benedict XVI

Outrage is what I feel. I am angry and that's why I am stressed. I cannot just let it go as someone suggested. There is so much more than being stolen from. It happened in my home which is our safe place. To help Mom move forward I hired professional cleaners, got Fr. Rene to bless our home again and I had everything they left physically removed from inside the house. That helped remove the bad vibes at home, but how does one remove six years of bad vibes we're stuck with? 

#BeKind #StaySafe

Hello Makati! Saw Dad's Old Office

Went to meet a friend this morning in Makati. His office was near one of my Dad's former offices. I was sad though to see the building abandoned already. Makati was surprisingly quiet. It felt more like a Sunday than a weekday. We were even able to park on the street by the building we visited. I guess not many people go to the office yet. It really felt like it was a Sunday. 

It was a rare treat to dress up today. I wore pants and a blouse! And shoes! I just normally wear a t-shirt and pambahay shorts  at home. I started wearing a t-shirt when I began hanging out in the craft room. I did that to feel a bit dressed up in case I had to get a delivery (which I never do since the boys forbade me hehe). Well, now I wear a t-shirt so they can be used and laundered. It's a good practice since it forces me to be more productive. 

I wanted to check out the new restos in Magallanes. There's a new nook there where the famous windmill resto used to be. I'm not sure when Starbucks, Pancake House, Krispy Kreme and Yellow Cab moved to the area, but it's a nice area since you can just drive through or do curb pick-up for your orders. We decided to get take-away at Pancake House. We were sitting outside when it started pouring, so we were forced to go inside.

Downpour!

Surprised to see that Pancake House now sells bread and ready-to-cook food! They have Pancake House spaghetti and country sausage, Teriyaki Boy chicken teriyaki, Dencio's krispy sisig, Yellow Cab toaster pizza and many more. We'll try it next time, but it's interesting to see how they expanded their menu to include ready-to-cook items. 

After getting our food we ended up in Krispy Kreme since it was still raining. Got tempted and got an OG card. We've been consistently buying doughnuts at KK the past two months so though we could maximize our purchase and give Mom free doughnuts too. Registering took a bit longer than expected, but we went home with half a dozen free doughnuts! Yay! By the time we left, the sky was blue again. That made it easier to get to the car hehe. 

Suddenly bright skies! Moody po si sky!

Traffic has always been light, the few times I've had to go out. Yay! I hope it stays this way since my legs start swelling when I sit too long. Hope my new cardiovascular doctor can figure out what to do with me. It was a nice day to go out today. Seeing Dad's old office building reassured me that we're going the right direction. :)

#BeKind #StaySafe

What If

I was ecstatic to see many friends pass the bar exam.  Wow! Most of them chose to become lawyers on top of their existing degrees and work experience. I truly admire them for doing that. It's really hard to work and study at the same time. I did that when I took my masters. A former manager (one of the VPs at G) asked me to pursue my doctorate. I promised her I would... it hasn't happened yet. Haha. I don't know if I have the energy to pursue a doctorate at this point. 

Today's OOTD is my Kulasa #kakampink shirt <3

If I followed what Daddy wanted, I would've been a lawyer. I took double degrees that's considered as pre-law. I disappointed my Dad and my professors because I didn't pursue it. I just felt it wasn't the right path for me. Maybe if I was allowed to run in the SK elections, maybe I would have taken a different path. Maybe I would have attained my dream to be mayor of my city. 

That's the what if, but I chose a different path and I don't regret it. I feel I was where I was supposed to be in the last 25 years. I also know I'm in the right place now. What I have experienced in the past two decades is unique and I'd like to believe I was able to help in my own little way. 

I don't like dwelling on what ifs because I believe in trusting the Lord to navigate your life. I gave up the struggle when I felt things weren't going the right way. Things righted when I lifted up everything to Him. I'm glad I did because I never second guessed whether I was doing the right thing. I always knew I was following His Will. 

Have a blessed Holy Wednesday everyone. 

#BeKind #StaySafe #VoteWisely

The Logic of Peace

Before going to sleep last night, I came across a tweet by Pope Francis. He said, 

That led me to read about Cain and Abel to understand better what he meant. I know Pope Francis tweeted it in the context of what is happening in Ukraine. The tweet spoke to me. I realized there's a lot to learn from his message. 

I cried buckets when I saw Pope Francis in Rome! I felt the same love surround me when I saw Pope John Paul II on World Youth Day 1995.

They say hurt people, hurt people. That is true and that's what we all do whenever we are hurt. I see this a lot everyday on social media. It's election time and it's gotten easy for people to throw mud to each other. I have been trying my best not to react anymore since it's not going to help anyway. It also brings a lot of stress and I've seen many friends quit social media because it's affected their mental health. 

Pope Francis made me realize that the source of my stress is from thinking like Cain. You cannot douse fire with more fire. The way to kill a fire is with water, thus you must deal with it by acting in peace. And if you continue to do war or lead with that mindset, then you can end up like Cain wandering in the desert waiting to be killed. 

I'm grateful for this tweet by Pope Francis because it helped me understand an issue that's been plaguing me for decades now. I realized that there are things you can never get back. The best way is to let it go and let it remain a memory. 

Let go. Let love. Be at peace. 

P.S. I'm feeling much better now after experiencing the effects of the booster shot. I still need to regain my strength and stamina. Hope to be back to normal in a few days.

#BeKind #StaySafe #VoteWisely

A Lesson on Radical Love

Today I learned what VP Leni Robredo meant when she said, "Mas radikal ang magmahal." A friend asked for some support for kakampinks in Davao. SunStar posted an update about the rally in Digos City and there are just so many negative comments. 

I liked the Sunstar post with a heart and then skimmed through the comments. Saw someone posting fake news, so I spent a little time getting a screenshot and her profile link. Another one was questioning whether the attendees are really voters and she criticized the many performers who come to these sorties. I suggested for her to attend so she can hear about the platforms. She said she wasn't from the area, so I suggested she could watch online. Then she went on about the rallies being full of anger. 

Yesterday with Mommy.

At that point I was getting a bit riled up already, but I told myself I don't want to end up like them. VP Leni said that they are part of who we are fighting for. Tried to explain to her that the anger stems from all the atrocities that have happened. We pay proper taxes, but the funds are misused. She responded by saying she is happy with what government has been doing. 

I realized then that her conviction is very deep for the other camp. I disengaged by telling her I had other things to do and suggested she make sure she's getting the correct information. I gave her the link of tsek.ph so she could check there. In my previous life I could have gone on and on. I decided to disengaged because getting worked up will affect my health and I do have a lot to do today. 

It was a good way though to understand what VP Leni said about radical love. She's really gone through a lot and I really appreciate the strength and energy she is putting behind her campaign. I've done Luzon- Visayas-Mindanao in one day once. Oh boy, that was so tiring! I never did it again. So you should really appreciate the effort she's putting to fight for us. 

Old Memories: Graduation Gift

I got through university (college) with a dot matrix printer. Inkjet printers back then were super expensive. Final copy of my thesis was printed on my thesismate's brother's printer which he brought to my house in the middle of the night. Printing was so slow and we almost did not make the deadline! I was finishing printing at home while Jingo and Alan stayed at our department's door to make sure the department secretary did not leave yet. After printing I rushed to the xerox place across campus to have the thesis bounded. Then rushed to submit it. Things were so cumbersome back then. 

Anyway, my Mom found my old printer - an HP Deskjet 400. I think it was their graduation gift for me. I do remember it was a printer, I'm just not sure if it was this or another printer. I did some research and found out it was manufactured around that time. It was very expensive, but I was so pleased they got me a printer for my graduation gift. Mom said she'll clean it up. I don't know though if it'll still work. We also found other old devices and have to figure out how best to retire them (happy to donate to a museum if there's one hehe). 

#BeKind #StaySafe #VoteWisely

Delays Can Be Good Too

The past two days have been very busy for me. I talked to so many people. More than the number I've spoken to in the last month. It's been challenging since I've had to take it really easy. I think I've made good progress in the past few days. I hope I will consistently progress. 

I looked at today's GodWhispers again for some inspiration. This was the message --

I wanted to blog before I left for physiotherapy, but I couldn't find the right words. I ended up delaying my blog post lol. Indeed the day got better and I found joy. 

A friend messaged me awhile ago to let me know how much my communities are flourishing. I was told the same thing yesterday. I was so happy to hear this bit of news. I feel so grateful that they're all coming together and doing what they do best -- help other teachers learn how best to use technology for learning and student engagement. 

I never worried about them because I know they are all good people and will continue the advocacy even without me. I learned through the years that taking a big step back oftentimes helps bring forward the best talents. My recovery may be delayed, but it's definitely brought about a lot of improvements. 

I am grateful :)

CB///347 #StuckAtHomeDay/Yr2/10 #StayHome #BeKind 

Is the Doctor In?

I tried to go back home a couple of years ago. I wasn't allowed for two reasons. One of them was the availability of medical care. We have a lot of great doctors, nurses and medical frontliners. The issue though was purely administrative. 

Many years ago there was a long discussion online on why you need to wait for a long time for your doctor. It's common to wait two hours for your consultation. I remember the discussion was really explosive that time. Many patients expressed their frustration because of wasted time.

On a thread one doctor explained the reason for the long wait is usually due to consultations that go longer. Doctors have to be thorough when they check you especially when you are a complicated case. I have a doctor here who's really very thorough. The average wait to see him is about two hours too. One of my French colleagues who went with me absolutely freaked out that day I went to see this doctor (well he insisted to accompany me! Na-stress lang ako sa kanya hehe). 

I don't have to wait long with my other doctors. Consults can go very long sometimes. My last visit to my respiratory doctor took an hour because I had a lot of questions for him. Luckily there was no patient after me so he indulged me. Back home there's a lot of horror stories about waiting for your doctor. The frustration of patients though is valid too. (I wonder if it's the same issue in other cities in PH?).

Granted that there are emergencies, long consults, rounds that run longer than usual, doctors that need to run to another hospital etc. I think a little administrative improvement can be done back home to fix this issue. My doctor's assistant is usually apologetic when the wait goes longer. Perhaps they need to remember (pandemic or no pandemic), waiting takes a toll on patients. We should probably outlaw "Filipino time". It is one of our worst traits. 

CB///342 #StuckAtHomeDay/Yr2/5 #StayHome #BeKind 

200 Days of This New Normal Life

Two hundred days ago we were told to work from home. I remember that day very well. It was a Friday and something strange was happening in our lobby. There were a lot of cleaners and I told myself, "Wow! They're making an extra effort to clean up!" 

Thirty minutes later I found out why. The day before a patient from another building tenant was picked up by an ambulance. He was one of the earlier patients who got infected. If I remember correctly he got infected from his parents who picked up the virus from patients zero (this was in news reports). I said a little prayer for the patients and thanked my angels for keeping me at home the day before. Later that day we were all told to work from home. 

This was the last time I was at the office, March 13, Friday, 7pm.

Working from home wasn't new to me. I did that for five years in Manila and then I moved to Singapore. We get super busy, but we still make time to have lunch together. That's the first thing I started to miss since Sweetie was still going to work for a few weeks before they were asked to WFH too. Secondly, I missed the prepared food and after meal coffee I would get with my seatmate. Sometimes we'd head down to Starbucks or Gong Cha for some merienda. I also missed the daily commute which allowed me to spin Pokestops and Inns (haha). And sometimes after work I take a walk around Harbourfront Centre/Vivo City before I head home. 

Last meal out before the circuit breaker started.

April was a flurry of activity. We managed to move apartments then. It was quite stressful, but it was a huge relief to move to a safer home. By May I was going bonkers and that's when I started baking and gardening. Eventually I accepted the fact that things will be uncertain for a longer period. I just needed to adjust to the new normal. 

Now that I'm used to living this way, I cannot imagine going back to the office. Sweetie now goes to the office two to three times a week. I only go out when I have physiotherapy or a doctor's appointment. We think it's better to just stay home for now since there are still random cases popping up and I'm still a high risk person. 

I was surprised to find out that wearing masks wasn't required yet last March. 

This was taken when we were new-home hunting.

I was chatting with my Ate last night and I told her that I am just so grateful that our family has remained safe and healthy. We try to help where we can. Here's how I cope -

(1) Pray

(2) Purposely disengaging from work at an appointed time everyday

(3) Follow my doctor's orders to live a healthy life

(4) Not spend so much time on social media (it gets quite toxic!)

(5) Work on my hobbies 

(6) Blog everyday (it's a challenge for myself, but writing keeps me sane)

(7) Check on loved ones (and nag the son every few hours)

I made the mistake of throwing myself at work. I worked 14 hour days because there was so much to do. I ended up sick so that's the first thing I worked on. Then I thought about how I could make things better everyday. I have days when things get quite stressful, that's when essential oils come in. I have friends who are still having a hard time, I'm just there whenever they need me. 

What about you? How have you been coping in this new normal?

CB//171 #StuckAtHomeDay/201 #WFH117 #StayHome #BeKind  

  

I'm Conflicted

There's something I've been praying for. When I pray for something I usually ask God to give me a clear sign (like the white rose). I think maybe I haven't made a clear request because the feedback has been conflicting. The universe is saying one thing, but my katawang lupa* is communicating something else. This means I should rework my prayer. What do you do when you're in that kind of situation?

My doctor gave me clearance to resume my physiotherapy sessions. I'm so grateful my physiotherapist is the most patient, kind and caring PT in the whole wide universe. Before we start our sessions she always asks me how I am and she adjusts what we do based on my state. She also already knows when I'm more tired than usual. This happens when my extremities couldn't follow the direction it should go (haha). She knows me very well so she adjusts as needed.

Sweetie told me he was going home late from work so I decided to go to Plaza Sing to buy dinner and flowers. Of course, I dropped by Spotlight to buy Mom some fabric (really! It wasn't for me!), picked up some groceries and flowers. I also got a bento from the grocery, it was cheaper than hawker center food and was yummy. I was properly tired by the time I got home.

My brain was still so fired up so I did some work on a doc I left hanging. Ahhh that effectively depleted me and I've been watching a couple of YouTube videos while blogging. I'm still conflicted though, I hope tonight's Reading will provide some needed guidance.


CB//162 #StuckAtHomeDay/193 #WFH110 #StayHome #BeKind 

Envy and Being Content

I think there is a delicate line between being content and envy. When you are content it is easy to be happy for others. It is easier to appreciate the achievement of others and give praise. I think it's only human to be envious too.

Growing up my parents taught me how to be content. I learned this lesson when my collection of stationaries* were stolen in school when I was in first grade. Me and my classmates would trade stationaries and keep it on a folder. Our bulky school bags were made heavier because of our collection. Anyway, so my collection got stolen. I cried buckets! I told my parents about it and I remember my Mom explained to me why people steal. She said it stems from envy when you are not content.

I still buy stationary, usually cute pads but I use them for making lists. Here's one nice set that was gifted to me by one of my Mom's friends a few years ago. 

Through the years there were constant reminders for this lesson. I guess that's also the reason why I'm not really ambitious. I've been letting the Lord lead me where I should be. Lately though I've been wanting something. It's been stressing me out also because I've been wanting it to happen now. Someone who I met with this morning over Meets mentioned about being content and that effectively snapped me out of this thing I want. I know it will come in time as long as I pray for it.

Envy also causes one to become selfish. Sometimes when you want to control something badly you end up just thinking about yourself and  not what's good for others. Sadly I've seen this happen to good people and it's really painful to witness. And even more painful when you get sideswipped when envy leads ones actions.

Be Kind.

*Do kids still do this nowadays? When I was a kid collecting nice stationaries (i.e. Hello Kitty cute pads) was the in thing to do.

CB//146 #StuckAtHomeDay/176 #WFH101 #StayHome #BeKind