Wellness Wednesdays: How to Keep Your Peace

I got very sick following the events that happened last May. I was truly heartbroken and that was topped off with other issues that I had to deal with. My doctor had to issue me additional medication to resolve the issue. Once I started breathing better I resolved to work harder at keeping my peace and not to get stressed. My doctors warned me several times already, stress will kill me. 

Cooling down by sandwiching myself between two fans. LOL.

The past week and a half have been quite stressful. My boys got infected with COVID-19 and I felt my body was also battling it. I went through strange symptoms early last week. The many prayers by family and friends, plus my maintenance medications probably saved me*. I was also bent on staying well so I could take care of my boys. 

He's happy coz I gave
him some chocolate.

I focused just on taking care of my boys. I knew it was going to take a toll on my body, so I drastically controlled things that could trigger stress. It was the only way to make sure I could feed the boys until dinner. When you truly know your kryptonite, you can avoid the potholes that could ruin your day.

I've shared the best advise I got from a doctor and I'm going to share it again. STAY OFFLINE. If you can't really stay offline, use a digital wellbeing app to determine and curb your online behavior. I still go online to read the news, read messages from friends and scroll through social media to see what my friends are doing, but I control how much time I spend on it. I've been spending so much time away from my phone it freaks out my friends when I don't respond to their messages immediately. 

My oxygen saturation has improved. My daily step count average has increased by 1,000 and I fall asleep faster now. The past two weeks have certainly been challenging, but I've been at peace. Keeping my peace has been key so I could take care of my boys. We're still waiting until their symptoms are clear before we can be reunited. I hope and pray that will come soon.

Thank you everyone for your support and prayers. 

*Watch this video by Doc Gerry Tan on how nasal spray can prevent COVID-19 infection. 

Business As Usual

Ahhh, I think we've finally achieved what's usual at home. We had Mom's home blessed again and her friends came over for a visit yesterday. I'm glad we took the proper steps to get to where we are now. I think what changed it for my Mom was her haircut! Haha! I wanted to do it at a salon so we can do it together, but she said she preferred Ate Belen to come over. I wanted her to feel that things are back to normal, so I got help from Mom's best friend to contact her hairdresser. 

I had a chat with Mom via FB Messenger about her party. I'm really happy to see she's now using the phone I gave her last year. She just kept it uncharged until now. I was planning to get an extension for our landline so I can chat with her frequently from my craft room. Looks like we can just use FB messenger now. The reception of Google Meets is much better though, so I'll probably try that tomorrow. She was so excited to talk about her get together. It's what she really needed. 

And the best thing about where we are now is I'm sleeping better! As soon as Miggy turns the light off I immediately fall asleep. That took years to resolve! I guess I've been worried about Mom for a long time now and resolving the issue at home is what finally relaxed me. I've also been able to start sewing again. Finished one of the long block curtains. Hope to finish the other one tomorrow.  

Now that things have quieted down, I'm picking up where we left off in late Feb. Miggy and I were supposed to get our booster shots together with my Mom. They only had Moderna. My doctors required me to get Pfizer again to avoid complications (i.e. clotting). We hope to get it this weekend. I've also restarted our home project. We've been in our new home for four months now and it's still a mess, haha! Ahh, one thing we're having difficulty with is getting medical insurance for me. Oh well, I hope our agent can find me a good one. 

It's Friday! Happy weekend everyone!

#BeKind #StaySafe #VoteWisely

There's Something in the Air

Taal Volcano has been erupting again. It had several phreatomagmatic eruptions in the past two days. The air has been different. I've been having allergies and have had to stay indoors. Unlike the 2020 eruption though, there's no ash fall. It was reported that it rained after the eruption, so that must have helped keep the ash there. I hope the families affected by the eruption are all okay and can go home soon. I pray that the Taal Volcano will quiet down soon since the businesses in the area are just picking up and recovering from the lockdowns. 

On a positive note, there are happy changes happening. Mom finally got her hair cut and she even had her nails done. I hope to get my booster shot in the next few days. I got some help from a friend since I'm required to get Pfizer. Got Mom more groceries also so she can have a variety of dishes that can be cooked for her. She's been eating a lot more now and has been more energetic. 

I watched the CaMaNaVa rally yesterday. It was a music extravaganza with 64 performers! I tried to stay up to finish it, but I conked out after Tanya Markova performed. I stayed up mainly to wait for my friend's band to perform. It was so cool they also observed Earth Hour. VP Leni cut her speech short for it. She wasn't really scheduled to join the rally, but she still showed up despite her very busy schedule (plus helping out for the Taal evacuees). I heard they have initiated house-to-house campaigning. This is very important to do and I mentioned this in a previous blog post. 

Planning for a less busy week since I'm getting my booster shot. Sweetie was down for a few days when he had his booster shot. Hope to finish everything I need to do before my schedule. We wanted to do it earlier, but had a hard time finding a non-hospital vaccine center that offers Pfizer. Too bad the Nayong Pilipino vaccine center only offers Moderna. 

Looking forward to have a better week! Enjoy the rest of your weekend guys. 

#BeKind #StaySafe #VoteWisely

I Felt Unsafe

Yesterday, my Mom had an unexpected visitor. It was one of her former drivers. We haven't heard from him in more than a decade now. Good thing a neighbor dropped by at the same time and was able to watch over Mom. 

It's hard not to be suspicious of anyone at this point. I was advised not to trust anyone also so I'm quite paranoid. I know I'm probably annoying Mom a lot, but I just want to make sure she's safe. Someone popping up after a decade long absence made me question his intentions. Mom said he just passed by and happened to see her. Really? 

It was a good reminder that we still need to be cautious. It triggered my anxiety though and by early evening I had to lie down. I pinged Kuya at 1 in the morning because the worry snowballed into other things. Good thing he was still awake and gave me some advise. 

Retired this door lock after 52 years of service.

I realized that I could take comfort in the fact that Papa Jesus will always be there for me. It is only in Him that I could feel truly safe. Overthinking will just stress me out and make me sick. I fell asleep immediately after that thought. 

My cousin posted this morning, "Don't stop being good because of bad people." Tomoh. What they did to us is not unforgivable, but it will take time to get it out of our system. I've SOS'd Kuya to help Mom get over it. If not, I'm afraid her room will be full of things she thinks may be taken. It's also hard for me because her assistant calls me in a panic whenever they can't find something my Mom misplaced. 

In time those cruel people will face the consequences of what they've done. Si Papa God na bahala sa kanila. I'll just continue working on putting things back to order. Suspending non-fun tasks this weekend to do some quilting.

Happy weekend everyone. 

#BeKind #StaySafe #VoteWisely

Some Friday Fun

We brought out Mom with us today. She was happy to see many developments in our place. She noted also that most of our neighbors had Leni-Kiko posters. We just went to one place for an errand. After that we did a short joyride around the park so she could see the church and the many bougainvillea plants she planted together with her friends. Mom also gave her new assistant a tour of the place. Oh, how I loved to hear Mom talk about her past projects. 

After we dropped off Mom, Sweetie and I did a simple date! We went to a nearby bakery and brought bread haha. I told him that was the closest to a date we've done since we got home from Singapore. Ahh, times have really changed, but we're just happy to be together as a family.

We've been so busy the past two weeks, we haven't been able to go walking! The activity of going back and forth to visit Mom has been our exercise. It was effective though in resetting my weird body clock. I've been falling asleep faster too. 

I'm still getting nightmares though from what happened. It will take time to heal. I think among the many things I've been through, betrayal is one of the hardest to forget. Well, things are slowly going back to normal. I really hope I can start making our summer curtains because it's been very, very hot! 

Now gotta go and water the plants. Hope you all have a good weekend!

#BeKind #StaySafe #VoteWisely

Indulgence and the Quest for Normalcy

Indulgence used to be a foreign word for me. At a young age my Kuya taught me how I should be careful with spending my money. He advised that I should prioritize buying things I need over things I want. I heeded that advise and I went extreme, haha. 

The first few years I was an OFW I set a weekly allowance for myself. It was SG$50 per week. I didn't need much since I would eat breakfast, lunch and merienda at the office for free. I would usually spend SG$4 to 5 dollars for my usual siew mai or char siu for dinner. If I saved enough I'd treat myself to Wendy's on weekends. Once a month I'd go to Lucky Plaza to remit money, then I'd swing by Daiso at Plaza Singapura to spend my SG$10 Daiso indulgence allowance. 

Well, that behavior allowed me to save enough money to buy a condo unit which was paid in full in half the time of our mortgage. I relaxed a bit eventually when Miggy and Jay moved to Singapore. We would usually have a nice lunch after hearing mass on Sundays. I also aimed to have a nice vacation at least once a year. It was only in 2019 though when I learned I was really being hard on myself. Kuya taught me a better way to manage my finances and I must say I've been happier. 

Last week was really challenging. I surprised the boys by ordering lunch from Friday's. This snowballed to Starbucks and a mini chocolate cake from Conti's. We don't go out so this is already a rare treat for us. I'm afraid to check my weight now. I lost weight last week and have probably regained it. Mom is the only one who has the license to gain weight. The service folks have already complained they are gaining weight from all the food I've been sending, hahaha. 

We're slowly easing back to normal. I'm still adjusting to managing Mom's house. I hope there won't be late night calls anymore for "walang tubig!" I'm amazed though, Mom's new helper sent me photos as their grocery list. Well, at least I know what brand they prefer. The best thing is I've been falling asleep faster and I wake up in a more decent time. Fitbit confirmed that my sleep score has improved a lot. 

BTW, I'm looking for a TV to replace what my Mom is using. I didn't realize TVs are so expensive nowadays! Like wow! Our newest TV is we got pre-loved from my former housemate in Singapore. Ahhh, I have an idea -- split it three-way with Kuya and Ate hahaha. Or maybe we can lend first one of our TVs from the condo to Mom for now. But anyway, suggestions are welcome! 

P.S. Don't forget to wear pink today!

#BeKind #StaySafe #VoteWisely

Break Free, Detaching from the Madness

PasigLaban was amazing! I just watched the whole event online. Chills kept running down my spine everytime drone shots were shown. I also kept getting teary eyed throughout the event. I felt that way because I am holding on to the hope that our country would be better. 

Many asked me why I decided to go back home. They told me that life in Singapore was better. It is much more convenient, but it's not home. And I've already felt the difference. When I got home I had to chase the accredited company to do my swab test at the hotel. I've had to submit letters whenever I have requests for the barangay and police. My agent had to go back and forth to government offices to process our new home papers and tax. 

I hope we can all break free from what we're stuck with right now. I think it was so cool that Ariana Grande gave a shoutout to the rallyists who were singing her song "Break Free". That's what we're also doing now -- breaking free from the atrocities a trusted family did to our home. It's been hard and we're still picking up the pieces. At least now the house is spic and span thanks to the cleaners. The pest control company will take care of the rats and I hope the barangay can help us remove the chickens (they're an invitation for snakes!). 

Doing all this while managing my health. I've had to stay home and let the boys do the legwork. It is still stressful though especially after uncovering a lot more anomalies. We've put in safeguards to keep Mom safe, but it is really hard to feel safe when you experience bad things in your own home. I've been asking Mom to stay with me for now, but she's adamant and wants to stay in her home. The best thing to do is to detach emotionally so it doesn't drain us. 

I seriously miss the days I'd just spend sewing and watering the plants. Well, I hope this would soon be over and we can make fully break free and move on. 

#BeKind #StaySafe #VoteWisely

Joker had No Remorse

I always wondered why Gotham City had a very dark setting. The places Batman went to always looked filthy and scary. It was a permanent crime scene. Batman was after all the cape crusader. He battled Joker, the supervillain who has a manic laugh. I've associated that laugh to someone who has no remorse. 

I thought things would be quieter yesterday after the debacle we went through on Sunday. Our neighbor's revelation was an eye opener on what happened in the last two years we were all forced to be away. She judged me for not taking action immediately and allowing things to get worse. 

To be honest, I felt defensive. I told her I've been sick and I had to confirm our suspicions first. Actually, I prioritized getting Mom checked up first before I did some sleuthing. Yesterday while dealing with harassment I realized that we were at fault too. 

My Mom is the type of person who would keep things to herself. She'd absorb all the pain to make sure we, her children, were protected. I suspected what was going on and tried to take over the management of the finances, but she refused. She told me she thought it would have been hard for Miggy. That's how she was taken advantage of. 

As a child, I always thought my Mom would remain the same forever. At the age of 78 she took care of me for 2 months in Singapore after I had heart surgery. She was also still managing my domestic finances until just before the pandemic. My Mom is the strongest person I know and I wanted her to remain the same. She's also very independent and never wanted us to hang around with her. She'd get impatient when I stay on the phone with her for too long (she prefers long calls with her amigas). 

Thinking my Mom would be the same was our downfall. In my mind I thought she was the same person she was when I was growing up. Strong, independed, a great admin. She tried to shield us, but I realized there comes a time when you have to take care of your parents differently. She's still very stubborn because I wanted her to stay in my house while I was fixing her affairs. She refused, as usual. 

And Joker would never have any remorse. Kuya said you can forgive, but justice has to be served. 

#BeKind #StaySafe #VoteWisely

Day of Reckoning

One of my favorite boardgames is "The Game of Life". I got it as a gift when I was a child and I was fascinated with the spinner in the middle. The concept of the game was to go through different phases of your life. From what I remember you start being single, get married, have children, acquire property, have debts etc. The day of reckoning is where you get paid a sum of money for each child, pay debts and this is where you make a decision whether you think you can become a millionaire. 

It's been more than 3 decades since I last played the game. It did give me a glimpse of what was ahead. There were more challenges, more issues, more pain than what the game teaches you. There's also a lot more happiness and love. 

I'm declaring today as a day of reckoning. It is the day I finally resolve an issue that has been plaguing my family for at least 2 decades. It was born out of a quest to help rehabilitate someone. That decision caused a lot of problems and got worse. The lesson from it is that sometimes when you want to help someone, but that person has a different motivation for sticking around. 

My family has given many opportunities for remorse, but the last straw was a lie. It led me to uncover a huge can of worms. It has caused my family a lot of pain, but it ends today so the healing can start. 

Please pray for us. 

#BeKind #StaySafe #VoteWisely

Shake It Off

I'm honestly been feeling down the past few weeks since discovering what's happening in our backyard. Much as I want to quash with Thor's Mjolnir (the mystical Uru Warhammer). Told Mom I'm avoiding going to her house for now because I don't trust I could control my temper. It's been a test of character and I know I still have a lot to improve. I haven't been sleeping well also because I'm super bothered.

It doesn't help that there's a lot of things going on in the world. It feels like the pandemic opened Pandora's Box. The war has affected all of us. The elections. These are just some of the added triggers. I buried myself in multiple quilt projects to calm myself down. When my hands are busy it means I could stay offline and avoid negativity. Taking care of my heart and mind is important because if I get anxious it affects my body. 

Here's how I've been coping:

Quilting projects

I just finished two sets of potholders, a set of coasters, cover for our blender and my KitchenAid blender. I skipped filming the projects because I wanted to enjoy creating. 

Gardening

It takes me an hour everyday to water my plants. I used to dread doing it, but I now enjoy it. My veggies are taking awhile to grow. I'm just making sure they don't die for now. I just got a rake and can't wait to try it later. 

Walking to Spin a Pokestop

Re-started walking to spin a Pokestop. It's just about a thousand steps every time we go. I always get a high after.

Puttering in the Kitchen

I haven't been able to do a lot of cooking and baking, but I just got a ginormous electric fan for the kitchen. I was able to bake though when it rained hard two weeks ago. Heat is my kryptonite! We haven't finished organizing our kitchen haha. 

Watching Happy Vids

I prefer to watch happy family vids now than travel vlogs. Also just discovered Jonathan Van Ness' show on Netflix. I only like some of the topics he's covered, but I like his energy. 

Time for me to water the plants! 

#BeKind #StaySafe #VoteWisely 

Sprouting

What brings a smile to my face the past few days is seeing the bell pepper seeds Miggy and I planted before Christmas sprout. They started germinating on new year's day. From four sprouts there are 20 tiny stems today. Wow! It's going to be challenging to re-pot them when the time comes! I need to find the mustasa seeds I harvested in SG. Must be in one of the boxes. 

Seeing the bell peppers start growing gives me hope. There's been so much bad news lately, the typhoon, the Omicron variant spreading fast, etc. It was disheartening to see friends suffer from the effects of the typhoon, moreso because it's Christmas. It is hard to celebrate when you know people are suffering. 

I had to remind myself about the time when we also went through a disaster. Our house was flooded and everything I owned went underwater. When I started to cry, Daddy told me those were just things and it can be replaced. I immediately stopped the tears and focused on recovering from the incident. Much as I worry for my friends, I can just pray they will have the strength to pull through just as we did. What's really more important is your life and family. Just help where you can :)

We finally unboxed the last kitchen box! Woohoo! My baking pans are still MIA though. Not sure if it was packed in a different box. We probably have about 20 more boxes to open. Organizing has been going very slow because we don't have cabinets yet to store them. My Mom told me it really takes time. 

Well, I just realized that we'll need to change our curtains soon. I told myself I'll make the curtains instead of buying since they can get very expensive. I already made one. It's 3.5 yards long! It cost less than a cup of Starbucks coffee. I'm learning more about fabric also with my curtain project. Making more curtains will allow me to experiment with different types of fabric. I'm glad getting fabric from Divisoria is accessible through Lazada and Shopee! Yay! 

Please stay home as much as you can. In Paranaque City, there were only 13 active cases on December 24, and as of yesterday there were 266 active cases with 79 new ones (Source: Paranaque PIO). 

#BeKind #StayHome