Remembering

I was washing the dishes after a hefty lunch when my Mom told me why the dogs in the neighborhood (and our dog) were going arf arf crazy last night. A nearby neighbor passed away last night, a son my parents' friends. He is their second son to pass away this year.

I don't know him personally, but my Ate and Kuya did and my Mom's announcement got me thinking about what I have lost in the past.

1. My Mama Lola (maternal grandmother) - there's a drawback to being the youngest in our generation in both sides of the family, I only met one grandparent, my Mama Lola. I grew up with her puttering around the garden (fab green thumb I tell you) and her sewing on the manual makina (sewing machine).

I was 12 when I got the call at around 5ish in the morning from the funeraria. I had no idea how to handle things, so when the schoolbus arrived I still went to school. I was tulala in school the whole day and just cried in my Dad's arms when I got home. I still miss Mama a lot since they say I got a lot of my eccentricities from her and I used to hang-out in her room a lot of times (it was where I'd hide whenever my Mom would force me to take a siesta). Mama passed away in her sleep at the hospital right after a butterfly suddenly appeared in her room (believed to be my Papa Lolo).

2. My Lola Iyay (maternal grand aunt) - my Mama Lola's sister. Lola Iyay absolutely hated going to Manila. She lived by the beach with her lovely dogs. It took me a long time to figure out that her dog Whitey wasn't immortal and that she just kept getting a new white askal whenever the last Whitey died. Oh yeah, and she's very funny too. My Lola Iyay spoke English like she was born speaking it. She was an English teacher and had many, many stories to tell and absolutely loved hearing about my love life. (I have so much to tell you Lola `yay!). She passed away in her sleep about 2 years ago.

3. Papa Lolo (maternal grandfather) - Papa Lolo died 5 years before I was born, but my Mom would always tell me stories about him and what a good story teller he was. I met him though, in San Francisco. I was 4 years old then and was playing by the window in a hotel room when he appeared right in front of me. He was wearing a white uniform with gold buttons and had this stiff hat on (he was in the army and was part of the Death March). This was our conversation:

"Hi Papa!"

He smiles and beckons me to come closer to him.

"Papa, are you going to tell me a story now?"

He nods yes and asks me to come closer to him.

"Talaga Papa? Story? Story now?"

At this point my Mom interrupted and asked me who I was talking with. I told her, "I'm talking with my Papa Lolo!" She then snatched me away from the window. I know I was just 4 years old then, but I do remember to this day how my Papa Lolo looked. A few years later I saw a photo of him in a white uniform and realized that I did somehow meet my Papa Lolo.

Last year, my nephew, Gabby had the same experience. What was funny was he didn't have any idea how Papa Lolo looked and he turned all white when we showed him his photo wearing his white uniform. We must've gotten our being pilyo from Papa Lolo!

4. My Pets - it took me a long time before I considered having another pet when my oscar (fish) named Oscar was killed by the ugly janitor fish. I had Oscar for about 3 years, so you can just imagine all the stuff that we've been through. Prior to Oscar, it took me about 7 years after Cotton (a japanese spitz) died to have another pet.

You see, I do really get so attached to my pets and it takes me a long time to move on (longer than boyfriends mind you, coz one doesn't live with a boyfriend right? LOL). To Bullet (a dog), Cotton, Ham & Egg (hamsters), and Oscar, Lucky and Pork & Beans (fighting fish) I hope you guys are very happy in pet heaven. (The janitor fish is probably still alive coz we left him go in the creek behind our house, hmph!).

5. Dead Toenails? (I don't have any.) Dead hair? (they fall off every day)... ahhh and I this cute ceramic bowl just caught my eye here in my study room, Ashes of my Ex(es). Well, I know I'm being funny (#1 to 4 was making me teary eyed already) and I seriously have that pot (I wonder if Sweetie noticed it hmmm)... I'm referring to dead relationships, friendships that fell apart and stuff that just didn't work out. That's life and it's normal. We all go through that cycle, but what's important is just letting go of everything that's in the past and move forward by cherishing what you have now.

Live and let live. I say, "Love and just love because that is why we are here."

To Mama, Papa and Lola Iyay, I know you are watching over me and the whole family. I will be with you again someday.

Boo! Awooo! Arf! Arf! Arf!

It is hallows eve once again and I am scared to move away from my PC and go to my room to rest. Why? Because I think I can see dead people again tonight. The hairs at the back of my neck are prickling with awareness. I feel like someone's looking in from the window. I am feeling skirmish about my dog's movements outside my window. I can also hear cats hissing and running around in the backyard. Oh boy, I'm sticking it out here in my study room with Miguel for the meantime.

My imagination is running wild that's what it is.

I couldn't help but be scared because sometimes I do see and feel things. Stuff that are unexplainable, unbelievable, makatindig balahibo but logic always prevails except on halloween. I am usually sick during halloween and I get more sick whenever I am asked to go to the cemetery. Don't ask me why, maybe it's psychological or something, but it happens every year.

So, I'm stuck here at home. I would've gone out with some of my neighbors for some catching up, but they're still stuck at work and have re-scheduled. Oh well, I guess I'll do some online chores and probably catch up with some friends (I'm sick and can't move around that much) and post in Tales from the Moonless Sky. Go on... scare yourself silly and visit my ghost story blog (which I do with Anne and Harry).

How I miss the Halloween parties I used to host here at home, well maybe next year -



Happy Halloween!

Photo by me, hehe, that was back in Halloween 2004.

A Starry Weekend

My original weekend plans did not push through, so I was left with free time! Woohoo!!! And what a fabulous weekend it was -

1. What was the Twisted Wedding Planner doing in this event?


2. Fan meets MYMP!


3. And meets Thor during his album "Soul Obsessions" launch where he does duets with a lot of artists including some of my favorites like Sofia, Nina, MYMP, Luke Mejares, and violinist Jerome Nunez.


4. Where did the Lakwatsera get this yummy burger?


5. But, nothing beats these stars. LOL.


#1,2 and 3 photos by Sweetie.

Sunday Video: Fruitcake

I know it's an hour after midnight already, so it's technically Monday! But then not technically still Sunday night... so since I've been playing Christmas songs the past few days I thought I'd share one of my favorite Christmas songs by the Eraserheads.

58 days before Christmas! Start making your lists!

Mindanao Bloggers Summit

I'm going to miss it today... huhuhu...

Here's what I was supposed to talk about -



Miss you guys!

P.S. Pasensya na po, nakalimutan ko magsuklay LOL.

Light a Fire

"To light a fire."

The first time I heard that line was when I was a kid. It was a bit vague at first coz it came from elders and as a kid growing up and spending more time with elders rather than kids my age, I just learned to observe and listen. It was a story told over and over again by my parents and their friends.

It was only while I was taking up Political Science in DLSU that I fully understood what "To light a fire" meant. It was actually a group, a movement that was put together during Martial Law to bring awareness to what was happening during that time. I believe Tito Ed's (Olaguer) book "Light a Fire" would explain better what exactly it was that they did during that time that got them arrested (I haven't read it, sorry Tito!). Anyway, they usually have a lot of laughs whenever they regale stories about that time.

Mom mentioned it again over lunch and the words struck me. To light a fire. I know there are a lot of things happening in our surroundings again and I know I may sometimes seem apathetic here in my blog, but I do care. My Dad's a lawyer and we usually have endless discussions about what's happening (I'm a political scientist after all!), but what exactly can I do? That's what I've been thinking about the whole day.

I'm no politician, no leader, I've no followers, so I'm basically just one person among 90 million other Filipinos, and my parents always told me that I should start in my backyard with my own family, then followed by helping out in my community. Diyan pa lang plus my work, my family, my Sweetie, fully booked na ako to the maximum levels.

So, this week, I started out with my closet - targeting to fill-up a huge balikbayan box with clothes, shoes and bags that may be of better use by others. Then I've donated my other PC to our parish (will deliver it within the weekend) and I've promised our parish priest to make another issue of our parish newsletter. I'm also helping out some charities (see links at the right side) one way or the other.

I think that's a better way of doing things instead of ranting and griping about things. DO SOMETHING. LIGHT A FIRE and keep this burning.

What do you think YOU can do?

P.S. Public service announcement for a friend, you may check for PRC Board Exam Results here.

Crazy 8

Anne tagged me for this meme, I haven't done any meme for quite some time already so I thought this would be something to blog about, but I've done several "random facts", "things you didn't know about me" etc. memes so I thought I'd modify the tag a bit -

1. List eight (8) random facts about yourself.
2. Tag eight people at the end of your post and list their names (linking to them).
3. Let them know they’ve been tagged by leaving them a comment on their blogs.

I don't just wanna do random facts... I wanna do 8 crazy random facts about me and these are things that drive me crazy or stuff I do that drive people crazy:

1. My desk is always in a state of organized chaos. Don't dare move anything coz I hate looking for things.

2. I am a pack rat. Okay, okay I've been trying to be less of a pack rat by targeting to fill-up one whole balikbayan box (the really big rectangular one) with old clothes. Goodbye to my favorite daster. Boohuhuhuhu. And I remember back in college I had this favorite sneakers. It already had a hole and was already yellowed with age, but I didn't want to dispose of it. So, I decorated it with three-dimensional glow-in-the-dark paint. My Mom stole it one day and I never saw it again. Huhuhu.

3. I have bags of all shapes, sizes, make, but I prefer using native bags. I can probably fill out another balikbayan box with old bags. Sheesh.

4. I had my closet painted bloody red. I like it, but my Mom almost fainted when she saw what I had done.

5. I like making people fat! Ask my former colleagues, friends, Miguel and Sweetie.

6. I hate disentangling knots. Yuck.

7. I love doing the dishes, but please take off the leftovers (paglilino). Euuw.

8. I love doing costings, projections, research and doing a full business plan, that's why I wanna study again and I can go on and on and on talking about insights from a research study I've done. Yeah, yeah, I know, they used to call me the company nerd. So? LOL. I don't mind, I love what I do.

I'm not tagging anyone, if you wanna do it... do it or leave a comment and lemme know 8 crazy things about you.