Note: I am writing this for two sets of friends :)
I am so utterly distracted by so many things going through my mind and I just had to get this off so I can focus on the stuff I need to prioritize.
So this is going to be one of my ten minute posts.
Maybe? It's always a question between guy and gal friendships. I think I must've lived long enough to experience quite a number of friendships that may or may not have ended in a romantic relationship.
What do I mean?
Remember Joey and Dawson (of Dawson's Creek)? They were friends since they were kids and eventually explored the romantic side of their friendship. Naging sila, but after so many seasons of going on and off they eventually accepted the fact that they weren't meant to be together. So Joey ended up with Pacey.
So is it really possible to have a guy best friend? I think so. I remember having this conversation with a friend while we were traversing EDSA. He asked me that question and I said that I think it is quite normal for opposite sex friendships to go through a time of "questioning". It's where you basically start thinking whether you'd end up together or something.
Yeah, it's a very sticky situation when one or both of you start thinking about it. I hate to admit it but it's usually girls who start thinking about it first. And, unfortunately for us girls it's the attention that gets to us. Give us extra special attention and we start mincing every single detail, SMS and gesture. We can't help it. It's our nature. Don't crucify us for it, help us out of it if you want us to be your buddy.
That's why I always tell my guy friends who get in such sticky situations to always, ALWAYS, be clear from the beginning. And I tell my girl friends never, NEVER to assume anything. (I guess that's why I am soooo dense). Never let that "Maybe" hang in the air coz eventually you'll start being awkward with each other blah blah blah. It's really fun though to have a guy best friend coz they always manage to give you real "guy perspectives" and they always cheer you up when you're sad. Do they ever make selos when there's a boyfriend? Nah, I don't think so, it's usually the boyfriend who ends up getting jealous. LOL.
Oh well, my ten minutes are up.
So, I ask you, is it really possible for a boy and a girl to just be friends? Without the "maybe"?
I started writing when I was 8. My mom got me a journal where I could rant (prob so I won't be an annoying brat). I stopped writing for 8 years until the pen and then later on the keyboard called on me again. I blog because I like writing and that's just about it. Hope you get inspired though... Bite the apple!
Ate Aileen, I think so. I also wrote about this a month ago...
ReplyDeletepinatatamaan mo ba kami ni.....?! well, surely guys & gals can be "just" friends...i remain "just friends" w/guys that I really like coz I want to keep them for good. :D
ReplyDeleteits depen :D case to case. i must admit though, na wala pa akong alam na guy-gal best friends who never questioned their relationship at least once and have remained the very best of friends till they grow old, like senior citizens. of course it doesnt mean that doesnt happen.
ReplyDeleteif you've seen the movie, when harry met sally, then the answer may be "yes and no".
ReplyDeletealso, if both the guy and girl get over the stage of considering if they should be more than friends then it would be smooth sailing from there.
but if one party gives in to his/her loneliness and starts to consider his/her friend as boyfriend/girlfriend material then problems can arise.
although let's be honest, it seems easier and more convenient to like somebody na friend mo na. at least you are over that stage where you wonder if you two will get along.
bottomline, it's one of the most complicated things. no clear-cut rules, only clichés =)
Hi Aileen, yes platonic relationships still exist and you are right, never assume. When I was younger, there are times when I go crazy thinking if a ceratin guy like me or what. It's funny that sometimes I'd think I should have shown some hints, etc. But as I grow older, I realized that when a guy likes a gal, he'll find a way to make ligaw kahit torpe pa yan.
ReplyDeletethe "maybes" should not be assumed. dapat prangkahan kaagad sa start (LOL)
ReplyDeletethe "maybes" can be avoided, dapat from the very start, prangkahan na (LOL)
ReplyDelete@riajose - aren't guys such weird creatures? hehehe.
ReplyDelete@eilanna - defensive? hihihihi. was I talking about you and err... maybe!
@lady cess - that's true, me and my best friend went through the same thing.
@dizzyb - I should watch the movie again, I remember it to be sooo funny. Oh well, I do believe in "being friends" frist.
@nina lumberio - that's true, when they want you they will really do everything to be with you.
@sexymom - life would really be easier if guys could be straightforward and girls unassuming :p
defensive?! moi?! naaaah!!! :P well alam ko naman kung sinu yung mga tinutukoy mo dito...yun lang medyo sumablay at dumaplis sa akin yung arrow... :D meron pa akong mas deep na comment dyan pero sa chat na lang natin pag-usapan! :D hihihi *sly smile* *wink* *wink* *wink*
ReplyDeletewell sis as you know...errr&i are like that...for the longest time! well mas malala nuon...alam mo naman un right?! yun tipong malabong ewan...minsan parang meron minsan wala lang...guess it all boils down to this...never ever assume anything unless he sez something!
ReplyDeletebawal entertainin ang mga "feelings" na yan! bawal magkaroon ng "feelings"! just take it as it is...wag mag-OA (overanalyze) :D
Yes mamai. It's possible. In fact, my bestfriend is a gal. Nagkikilatis ng mga "prospect" ng bawat isa, hehe. At 'pag may nagtatanong sa amin kung magiging kami daw ba in the future, iisa lang ang sagot namin: "Hinding-hindi! Ewww! May taste kami pareho!" LOL.
ReplyDeleteAileen I can really really relate to this right now... being apart from the guy and yet so close to him everyday just breaks my heart again and again. But we both know we are not meant for each other. We have already accepted that fact...
ReplyDelete@claire - I've been through this a couple of times, one worked out really well coz he's still my best friend, the other one well I felt he was just really leading me on so I dumped him and then I really learned my lesson after that and I'm now more wary than before, but that hasn't stopped me from having more close guy friends. But it's really, really hard. Sniff. Hugs.
ReplyDeletedya still remember ung tribute ko sa aking best friend who happens to be a guy?! (Si Dan?!) ayun... :D (gising ka na nga! chat na lang tayo! at nang di ako dito nangungulit sa blog mo! :P) ehehehe
ReplyDelete@eilanna - I was awake already! I was at the airport kasi hehehe and ito pakalat kalat naman ako sa Iloilo. Ttyl!
ReplyDelete"NEVER to assume anything"
ReplyDeleteWow, I wish I had more friends who lived by this statement.