Happy Two's Day!

2-22-2022!

Two's day on a Tuesday! 

I found a trick to make me fall asleep faster. I read a chapter of a book. I've been having trouble sleeping and it takes me hours to finally fall asleep. Reading helped! Before drifting off to sleep I remembered one of the most important lessons my Dad taught me about values. 

I was previously stuck in a bad relationship. On the outside it seemed all good, but it came to a point where we just kept disagreeing about everything. One day my Dad sat down with me in the kitchen to tell me he did not approve of the relationship. He was worried it will end in a disaster because our values was very different. At that time I was already questioning myself whether staying in the relationship was worth it. 

I cried and cried and cried, but I realized what my Dad said was true. Our disagreements stemmed from our value differences. I was tired and unhappy and for my sanity I let it go. Having the same values with your partner is very important. It can make and break your relationship. My Mom explained if your values are different even the smallest things will bother you. It will eat you up and eventually break you. 

It took me years to heal and when I got around to dating again I treated it differently. Eventually I met Sweetie and the rest is history. So if you're stuck in a bad relationship, assess whether it's because you have very different values. It may save you from a lifetime of pain. 

And that applies as well to your choice of candidate. Make sure you choose wisely. :)

Rest in peace my thesis mentor, Ms. Cherry. We were her first gold thesis awardee. Will miss you. 

#BeKind #StayHome #VoteWisely

The Day After the Wedding

Chanced upon our after the wedding photos last night. I was uploading old photos to the cloud and got curious on what happened after our wedding more than 11 years go. 

We checked out of the hotel the day after the wedding. Good thing my parents brought home all the gifts. We went straight to our new home, a 3-bedroom apartment we rented from my Mom's friend. Of course, Sweetie carried me inside our new home. Back then I was so easy to carry haha. Here's the video --

Our new home was a huge mess when we arrived. The first thing we did was put some order to our new home.  After fixing our home we opened gifts! That was super fun to do. I still have a list of everything we got and we're still using most of what we got. 

We were saved from preparing food because we went to my parents' home to eat and they sent back a lot of food for us. The first meal we ordered was Binalot! 

I guess we were able to go to SM Hypermarket because we also ate some maki with leftovers. Sweetie also made a salad (I can confirm his red sando is still alive until today hahaha). 

The next few days was spent attending a gazillion family reunions. Mom and Dad also celebrated their golden wedding anniversary a week after our wedding. We only started to settle down after the second wedding. The weeks that followed were very eventful. I was able to blog most of it on our "Mabuhay ang Bagong Kasal" blog. Reading about our first cooking attempt, the first laundry day where our new washing machine broke down, and almost poisoning both of us is so hilarious. 

Our logo by Miggy and Gail dela Cruz Villanueva.

Since our first home we've lived in six other homes in two countries. We learned a lot since we tied the knot more than 11 years ago. We've had our ups and downs and a smattering of challenges. Our love and faith has kept us solidly together. And everyday still feels like those first few weeks after our wedding. The adventure continues :)

Day 6 Gratitude Challenge, A Smell You Love. When I was young it felt weird when my lola and titas would smell me like they sucking the life out of me. The funny thing is I do the same now especially for babies! Haha. My nose is super sensitive so I don't like overpowering smells (or anything that smells for that matter). I guess I love the smell of the people I most especially love.

CB///*Yr2/92 #StuckAtHomeDay/Yr2/119 #NewG354 #Home128 #StayHome #BeKind 

Knowing When It's Time to Let Go

Break-up. Leave. Move on.  

Ending something is probably one of the hardest things to do. It always brings heartbreak and a mix of emotions. I have been through many of these painful moments, but I've always come out of it stronger and wiser. 

But how do you know when it's time to go? 

I must admit when it came to relationships it was always hard for me to let go. The reasons were always very obvious, but I always held on. I would just sum it up to what my Mom advised me before, "When you don't have the same values as your boyfriend, it will probably not last." I held on to those words when I finally walked out of a 7-year relationship. After that I just let God take over my love life. 

I had ten jobs before I found the one. My career movement was always driven by my quest to learn more. I did have my fair share of bad managers, but that's not what really drove me away (well, once). I had a list of skills I wanted to gain and that's what I followed whenever I moved to a new job. Key for me was to learn as much as I could. 

It's really hard to know when it's time to let go or pursue a new path. My Kuya gave me a list of questions I fill out whenever I have big decisions I have to make. He also advised me to do the St. Ignatius spiritual exercises to make sure that it is the right decision. 

CB///*Yr2/38  #StuckAtHomeDay/Yr2/65 #StayHome #BeKind

How to Make Your Love Last a Lifetime

Today is my parents 56th wedding anniversary. We had celebrated their golden wedding anniversary back in 2010 with a simple renewal of vows and a party with family and friends at home. It is going to be a milestone year for me as I have been asked to be a godmother for two weddings. I honestly got freaked out the first time I got asked and it took about a year before I was ready to accept an invitation.

My parents imparted on us the seriousness of marriage. As the old saying goes, "Hindi yan tulad ng mainit na kanin na pwede mo na lang iluwa" (It's not like newly cooked rice that you could just spit out). Your love should go hand in hand with commitment.

I never saw my parents fight when I was growing up. The only time I saw them not talk to each other was after their golden wedding anniversary. For three days they did not talk to each other and refused to say why. I panicked and called up my siblings to let them know. It was a bizarre experience. And then on the third day they just started talking again and explained that they had forgotten about what they had argued about. My Mom explained to me later after Dad passed away that they would fight, but agreed to never show it to us.

My parents were great role models for me. I had stumbled a couple of times along the way, but my Mom always reminded me that when I find a spouse he should have the same values as we had. I remember making a very long list of the ideal guy. The only item that Sweetie didn't get was to have straight hair (haha). Finding the right one is another story I will tell on another day, but here's a list of bilins from my parents before I got married and some stuff I've picked up from them.


1. Put God at the center of your family.
2. Always settle your differences before you sleep.
3. Give and take. Negotiate.
4. Talk, always. Laugh everyday and be playful.
5. Be on time all the time. Follow the 5Ps.
6. Be happy to be in each other's company and do things together. (My parents rarely went out and were always together).
7. Share your friends!
8. Budget very wisely.
9. Live simply.
10. Family first.


My parents lived a very simple life. We lived on a bungalow with lots of space which took my parents 15 years to pay. We rarely took out of the country family trips (only 3) and usually stayed with relatives. Their idea of a family vacation was taking a rode trip to go to our hometown in Bicol where we'd live in a nipa hut by the beach. Our home was also like a mini-farm. We had fruits and veggies growing in our backyard and had chickens, quail, kuhol, dogs, cats, birds, fish etc. as well. Eating out was a luxury. We were simply just together all the time.

We are far from being a perfect family, but my parents strong marriage always kept us together. Their original wedding date was supposed to be January 2, 1960, but because of a very strong typhoon they had to move it the next day. Their marriage may have started from a disaster, but their resilience and their commitment made it strong and a love that is forever. 

What Makes a Good Life?

It's really impressive that Harvard has been running a 75-year old study on happiness and satisfaction. The fourth director of this study, Robert Waldinger, recently did a TED talk on adult happiness. I suggest you spend 12 minutes to watch this video -

My parents got it spot on.

Growing up my parents insisted that we all be home before sunset. As a rebellious teenager I always broke this rule (well my class normally ended at 6 in the evening). My parents only went out for very special occasions and preferred to hang out with friends/relatives at home. It was also preferable that my friends would come and visit us at home so they could meet them (and validate they weren't bad influences hehe).

Looking back I now realize that my parents knew what was essential -- relationships. They lived very simply and focused on family, relatives and a close set of friends. We normally ate at home and eating out was a big treat. Shopping was an affair that was pre-planned and we only went shopping when needed. And the preference was to stay at home.

My Kuya during my Mom's 80th birthday celebration shared that our parents really lived up to be a true Christian. Our home was home to whoever needed a home. We always had extended family who lived with us and my parents always extended a helping hand to those who needed it. I remember my Dad worked on a project that freed prisoners who were innocent but jailed. And he gave free legal advise for those who needed it. My Mom mentioned that early on in their marriage farmers would come to their home bearing live chickens as a thank you for my Dad's legal advise.

And what Mr. Waldinger shared is so true. Happiness and satisfaction isn't about being rich or famous. It's about being in good relationships. And that's why my prayer for this year is to have my family together in one country (so I'm not so sickly!). 

Courtship 2.0

Being the youngest in our clan has given me the privilege to be exposed to relatives of all ages. I have nephews and nieces who are older than me, so technically I'm already a grand-aunt of sorts. I think I was in third grade when I was reeled in to help in wedding preparations of an aunt and a cousin. Eventually my sister, then my brother. During those times my parents, aunts, uncles and cousins would tell me love stories.

In the olden times (like 1950s). This was the time that guys would make harana to girls and according to my Mom it's true that sometimes strict mothers (or naughty brothers) would throw out the contents of the urinola (euww!). And during that time during dances guys would instruct their friends to surround their girl so no one else can approach her (being territorial huh!). With no telephone or gadgets, the best way to reach a girl was to send her love letters.

In the 80s. My Mom told me back then that when my time comes I should be courted properly, with a guy going to the house with flowers etc. and if ever we go out there should be a chaperone. I did play chaperone to my sister a couple of times (we're 16 years apart) and I often enjoyed the gifts her manliligaws would give me. They'd come to the house to pick up my sister and I'd usually be the first to say hi to them. Of course, they had to have pasalubong for the pesky little sister.

My worst nemesis then was my future-brother-in-law who forgot to bring me some cotton candy. I was so disappointed and cried when he arrived empty-handed. He came back a week after with two huge cotton candies for me. Oh I do remember my sister making telebabad in the wee hours of the night hehehe. My sister says she has a box full of love letters from my brother in law.

In the 90s. So things were a bit different in the 90s. Technology started to drastically change how we communicated. This was the time that the beeper was the in thing and in the mid-90s cellphones started to be popular. I remember when I joined Smart they had just marked their 500,000th subscriber. A lot of people though still burned lines at midnight and wrote letters.

The new century. The last decade has drastically changed the landscape of how we communicate, much less the rules of courtship. My Mom just shakes her head with how we "youngsters" communicate. Relationships are born out of SMSing, chatting, Friendster, Multiply, Facebook and other social media stuff. My friend in Pakistan told me that Orkut (Google's social media platform) really changed how men and women would meet in his country.

And based on feedback from my nephews, this is how one can find out if you're already "together"...

"Should I changed my Facebook status now?"

Pagtatanan (to Elope)

The thought has crossed my mind several times because of the long list of stuff one has to do for a wedding. A one day event that takes months and months of preparation. It can be crammed but you'll probably end up really ugly on your wedding day because you won't get any sleep. 

I just thought of writing about eloping because I remember that it has occured several times in my family. My paternal grandparents eloped! Nanay was chinese and during her time it was unheard of to marry a Filipino, so they eloped. I have an aunt who also eloped, I think because Tatay was very strict. And then my buddy-cousin also eloped. O diba uso sa pamilya!

But then at my age it would be shameful even to think about it. LOL.

So why do couples elope anyway?

1. Because their parents are against the relationship

2. Because they are forbidden to be together because of their race

3. Because their religion is different

4. Because they don't want to bother getting permission or the blessing of their parents so they just elope and just announce they're married already

5. Because they are very much in love (like some artistas who eventually annul their marriage)

Save for celebrities who eloped and eventually broke-up, all those who eloped in my family have had successful marriages. My aunt even had a grand wedding during their 50th wedding anniversary because they never had a real wedding. 

Would you consider eloping?

First Love

Do you remember your first love?

I would assume that a lot of us go through several relationships first before we find the right one, after all we usually get our bit of first love as teenagers and due to immaturity, stupidity and what-not it just doesn't always work-out. Fear not since it just usually gets better and when it comes at the right time things will just fall into place.

My Mom married her first boyfriend, my Dad and they would usually rib each other about being together for the longest time. Earlier today my Mom was saying, "I don't want a grand celebration for our golden wedding anniversary." (It's going to be next year). 

My Dad answered, "Well we won't, we don't have money to spend anyway." (Siyempre that's our job na). 

And then my Mom told me, "You mean I have to marry the same person?" 

Then Dad quipped, "Yeah, our contract is only for 50 years since that's the prescriptive period for marriage contracts." (He is of course just kidding and making things up. I definitely don't remember any prescriptive period for marriage in the Family Code.)

Yes, my parents are still very much crazy in love with each other and it drives me nuts when they are in that mood. And I guess despite all the upheavals in my love life in the past I never gave up on love. Baduy man, but when you find that person you can giggle with over some insane, mababaw jokes you just know you are on the right track.

And this post was inspired by the McDonald's TVC "First Love" which I plurked about over a week ago. 

Single Awareness Day

This day last year I was a singleton celebrating Valentine's Day... in an airplane. Arrived in Manila at around 10 in the evening and waited for the printer to deliver some materials I had printed. I was also rushing about since I had to be early the next day to do ingress for an exhibit. Little did I know that the person I had a belated Valentine's merienda with (well not really to celebrate Valentine's) would become my Sweetie!

I couldn't stop laughing over my dear friend Sorsi's recount of how her family and friends in the US have been trying to set her up with someone, anyone actually. Head over to That Girl Was Me and check out her latest adventures. I know I'm the one to blame for some of the horrors she went through recently and I try my best to cheer her up and motivate her to hang-on and aim to get the best. Hey, I waited years before I got found by the right one and here's how I managed to hang-on:

1. I read books! I went through Joshua Harris' "I Kissed Dating Goodbye" and "Boy Meets Girl", Greg Bernhardt's "He's Just Not Into You", "The Rules" (forgot who the author is sorry), and the best was Bo Sanchez' "How to Find Your One True Love".

2. I met boys! At some point I really didn't want to date anymore. I made a mandate not to date anyone for a whole year after my last relationship. Why? To prevent rebound since it was a 7-year long relationship. I only actually started dating 2 years after only to get frustrated since I didn't realize that even friends would be such boleros. After reading Kuya Bo's book, I kept myself busy and did my homework of meeting 5 single guys every week.

3. I made friends! I will not be a hypocrite and say I did not start falling for some of them, but hey I'm a girl and it's quite easy for girls to fall. I knew though when to stop and did not give my heart to any of them. I also made it a point to keep the boys I met as friends (save for a couple who became Mr. Hyde after a while). I also managed to make a lot of new friends last year from all over the country (and the world).

4. I made peace with my past! It's kinda strange but I always felt that I would only find the right one once I made peace and put closure to my past. It was kinda weird but each one of them just showed up one by one early last year and the last one just popped up just before new year.

5. I kept busy! My work kept me sane since I was always doing one thing and another. I also tried out doing new things, bugged old and new friends. I remember Kuya Bo's book had a list of suggestions on what you could do as a singleton.

I did give up and thought I'd remain single forever. Good thing the Daddy and son tandem I had as seatmates in the airplane kept me sane. I made up my mind then that my life would just be about my family, work, some interests and perhaps study for a doctoral degree, but maybe, maybe because I was closer to heaven when I was saying my prayer, God heard my last plea and granted my prayer.


Here's a funny video that's quite appropriate for Valentine's day -

Next Please!

Yesterday during lunch my Mom was telling a story about a girl whose boyfriend suddenly dropped her to marry another girl. Tragic isn't it? That and a million other stories of heart break. That's why don't date crazy people!

Anyway, so I just flippantly told my Mom, "Ma, kung ayaw nung guy, eh di huwag! Sabihin niya, next please!" My Mom agreed and said she'll tell the girl that there are many guys out there. And I'd like to make that appeal to a dear friend of mine. (If I was there with you, I'd probably boink your little head!).

It's so easy to play the martyr for someone you love and just accept whatever it is that is thrown your way. "Because I love him." I totally disagree. I wasted so many years of my life on someone who was totally unworthy. Because I thought it was the right thing to do. It is not and by golly give yourself a lot of love and respect. No man should insult nor belittle you to cover up for his follies and insecurities (ay galit ang lola niyo!).

"He's Just Not That Into You" and "The Rules" are two of the most interesting books I've read. Both books basically said that if a guy is really into you he'll do everything in his power to make you fall in love. Hahamakin ang lahat mapa-ibig ka lamang. Men are hunters and they will pursue you until they have you. (Read the two books and then read Bo's book).

Now, don't fall for the first guy who pursues you with a passion. There would be guys who just love the pursuit and they'd drop you like a hot potato once they are done (I know one who does this every 6 weeks). Be mindful of his values, the respect he gives you. Check his family background, his trustworthiness etc. etc. (check out Bo's book hehe).

Huwwwhaaaattt??? You might ask. Well, raise the bar girl! Don't settle for anything less. And pray.

And I'd like to plug a project of The Usual Suspects - You Got Blogged - check it out and get a chance to win $150 when you join the contest.

And here's my Sunday Video (which I should change to Monday Madaling Araw Video LOL) -



And I might say, if you're not ready to "take all your chances" with that one guy, then don't even think about lending your heart to him.

And, I'm NOT saying "next please!" this time around. What do you think Sweetie?

Love, Music and Friendship

My brain's been muddled up lately with a lot of things (isn't that usual?) and I just don't really know what to blog about! Too many things buzzing around my head and I just couldn't get a handle on what I should post about. Well... I did manage to post something on my work blog about the newest gadget on iGoogle (Blogger Play) after realizing I haven't done a post for 2 weeks already and something about bridal showers in the Twisted Wedding Planner. See? Sometimes it's really better to have a niche blog, at least you know what exactly you should post about. Sigh.

So, I'm doing a random thoughts post. Pffffttt.

1. "You'll just know," is what all my married friends told me when I asked them about "How will you know if he's the one?" And after ranting about my ideal guy, my type of guy, whether it's better to be single or married, I finally have an answer! Yes! The sky is fantastically falling! I finally have a love story to tell. And, I think, my Dad's poem for my Mom (which he wrote about 50 years ago) says it best. You will just know. And for my Gtalk contacts... sorry for being so mushy and cheesy the past few weeks. Tao lang po. LOL.

2. Love is simple. I always believed that love is not complicated. That when it comes, it just falls right into place. No hitches. No hassle. No apprehensions. No anxiety. And the best thing is to be with your best friend. I've met a lot of guys. And I've even made a list on what kind of guys to stay away from based on my experience. It's gotten so bad that I really given up and I was entertaining spinsterhood thoughts on my way back from the US. LOL.

3. Rachel Anne Wolfe and the Aquarela Band. Attended Rachel Anne Wolfe's "Cool" album launch at Fully Booked last October 12, Friday with Sweetie. If you're a child of the 80s I'm sure you'd remember Rachel Anne Wolfe since she's one of GMA's stars. I was quite surprised that she sings (well I don't really remember) and she's still very pretty. She was very down to earth and very much into the internet like her brother, Richard Merk who couldn't stop saying "Google made my life easier!" when I met him.

I also met the Aquarela Band couple, Miguel and Evelyn Juteau, who does bossa nova. I've only listened to a sample of their work in the Multiply account and will most probably borrow Sweetie's CD. I think it would be interesting to listen to since the snippet showed me a different take on bossa nova music. Too bad I missed Sitti's recording of her new album! Arggghhh. Jetlag!!!

I was too shy to have my photo taken with Rachel Anne Wolfe, but I managed to have one taken with the couple (Photo by Jay).


4. Meeting a famous composer. When my best friend and I started hanging out last January, I've experienced meeting a number of celebrities because of him and I've always been starstruck (and when you're in a roomful of media people, it gets quite obvious hehe). Ewanko ba ambabaw ko kasi eh. And when I met famous, award-winning composer, Trina Belamide (she "Tell the World of His Love", "Now that I have You", "You've Made Me Stronger) among others), I was starstruck again. Sweetie's always full of surprises, I dunno who I'm going to meet next. Hehehe, I don't think I'll get used to it ever.

Here's one of her award-winning songs (Overall Second Prize, 1999 USA
Songwriting Competition) -



5. My brain's really mashed up, so here are some photos from the past week -

Taste Asia "3" with Jehzeel, Andrew, Karlo and Miguel. Thanks to Bella of SM Hypermarket for assisting me when I did some grocery shopping! (Photo from Andrew)


At Bonifacio High Street with Andrew, Jay (a.k.a. Sweetie), Juned, Rico and Sasha. (Photo from Andrew)


My second family during Mabel's despidida de soltera. "So who's next?" my Mom asked. (Photo from Micholle taken by Sweetie). (See? Miguel's taller than me now!).

When Control Spells Trouble and Who Not to Date

I know this would end up to be a very revealing post and I actually thought about it for a couple of weeks before writing. This is for some people who are very close to my heart and I'm writing this for them in the hopes that they will not go down the same path I did... in my previous life.

Sometimes in our quest to find our "one true love" we end up compromising a lot of things, even our principles. We may think it is love, but I'd say it's stupidity. What do I mean?

I had a former boyfriend who was overly controlling. There were times he would call the guard in our office just to ask what time I left and who I went down the elevator with. He would then "time" how long before I got home and chastise me even if I was a few minutes late. He would control what I ate, what I wore, who I spoke with. He'd read all the messages in my phone. He wouldn't allow me to attend office functions in the evening. He would not allow me to watch movies with my friends. He would not allow me to sing in the choir. He'd go into rages and would accuse me of seeing other guys. He became jealous and very possessive. Get the picture? It is I believe a form of abuse.

He sucked my life out of me. Well, almost. I was really feisty back then. I'd fight back, but I'd always lose because I was very afraid of losing him. I lost my sunshine. I changed. I even lost my muse for writing. I compromised what I knew was right. I compromised what I wanted. I compromised my principles. I was unhappy, but I just couldn't bear not having him.

I realized though that my true self was telling me something when I wouldn't do anything to fix our wedding. The date was moved thrice already. I always told him I was busy (I was going up the ladder in my career then). I was fixing our papers for migrating (he wanted to, I didn't), but it was all such a hassle to me and I was getting red tape from one task to another. I knew then that God was telling me something. So I prayed and prayed hard for clarification. And He answered, one prayer after another. Walang mintis.

I don't know how I survived. I was reedly thin then (I'm really fat now!). I did really well at work. My depression was like a light switch. I could turn it off and on (that's good control LOL). At work, I'd be so bright and cheerful like nothing was wrong. It was a month after before I managed to tell my family that I already broke off our engagement. My parents were very worried, but my Kuya told them not to worry because he knew that whatever it was I was going through, I would go back to my roots, to who I really am. And, I did, I pulled through. It may have taken a long time for me to heal, but my friends, family and my faith got me over it.

And since the, I told myself. I WILL NOT COMPROMISE. I will not settle for anything less. I'd rather be single for the rest of my life rather than be stuck with somebody who will just eventually make me unhappy.

And no, I did not meet the perfect guy right after that relationship. Brother Bo said you have to meet a lot of guys. The worst thing you'll have is a new guy friend. Right? And believe me there are a lot of guys who are not ready to be in a relationship, they are just playing or rather... they are still being honed to be men. I know, I've been quite upset it for the longest time (years) and I always asked Papa God how come they don't make guys like my Dad anymore? I think they're a dying breed.

So, my dear girl friends, control is just one of the many things that you should be very wary about... be scared, be very scared when:

1. A guy seems to say all the right things and seems so sure of himself and what he wants. He just wants you and is most probably just after your body. Bolero yan promise.

2. A guy seems to turn off his ear when you are sharing a problem. Remember, the most basic component of any relationship is friendship. If he doesn't want to hear about your day or is not even compassionate about you having a cough or a fever, even as a friend, naku iha he's not worth it.

3. A guy that forces you into schedules. Tsk tsk tsk. You are not a task list item. He's probably forcing you to fit in his schedule because he has others in his schedule. Multi-tasker ito!

4. A guy who tells you not to contact him. Ano ka kabit? If you cannot freely contact him anytime, wake up! That spells a lot of trouble. And forcing you just to talk with him through IM (this is true for LDRs), naku, kuripot na obvious pang may tinatago. My guy friends in the US call me often, and those are just friends ha.

5. A guy friend with whom you might have something going tells you, "Don't get too close to me, I might fall for you." And then goes and gets angry with you when you stop being malambing to him. Girl, that guy definitely has a lot of issues, if he can't face the fact that he likes you even though all your friends say so, it just means he is not that into you. Stay away.

6. A guy who has a girlfriend and still courts you. Even if he says, "Give me a chance, I'll leave her for you." Remember, he can do that to you as well. How can you trust a person who's like that? Asa pa siya.

7. A guy who is reportedly a womanizer. One that your friends have warned you about. You might be just one of his trophies. He probably has a lot of issues and in the end even though he tells you he loves you, he'd be so screwed up already because of his past.

8. A guy who doesn't treat his mother or sister right. That's how he'll treat you as well.

9. A guy who gets mad at the smallest of things and accuses you of stuff you did not do. It's his ghosts haunting him. Plus a guy who lies a lot and makes you lie for him. Goodness, let's not even delve into that.

10. A guy who kisses and tells. You'd know coz you'd be one of the ones he tells to. Tsk tsk tsk.

I asked a lot of my married friends how they came to the conclusion that they were marrying that person and all of them said one thing, "You just know." Armed with that "truth" , I did not allow myself to become bitter over all the stuff I've gone through. I told my best friend (now upgraded hehehe... and I'd say... I just know, I've known from the start silly... did I really have to go 10,000 miles away? LOL) that if my last relationship did not work out, then I'd just treat is as an adventure. It did not work out.

I wrote this piece for a couple of people who are close to my heart. It breaks my heart to see them in a situation where I was years ago. It was horrendous and I really do not know how I survived it, but I could safely say that I've put a closure to all the stuff from my past already and I am looking forward to a very bright future. There is hope girl. Pray.

I wasted 7 years of my life on one guy, don't do the same stupid thing I did.

What about you? What's the most stupid thing you've done for a guy? Who do you think you should NOT date?

Makulay ang Buhay sa Sinabawang Gulay

Okay, I'm not really referring to that video. It's cute and funny, but a bit annoying, I'm sure the kids would've picked it up as well just like the LUK4 jingle (LOL). Anyway, my friend's have been teasing me about having a colorful life. Nah! I really couldn't understand why I always get myself in scrapes and whatever. But things always work out one way or the other and the best thing to do a lot of times is keep mum about it (le unbloggable hehe).

Well, on the brighter side of things, there's loads to do and a lot of stuff to look forward too (but I definitely do not want to get stranded again!). Yeah, I'm just rambling on...

Oh, my poll on "What to do when you are brokenhearted?" just closed and here are the results -

Get wasted again and again - 41%
Shop till you drop - 11%
Bury yourself in work - 58%
Find a replacement for the lost love - 17%
Cry and cry until the tears run dry - 35%

Well, it was just one of those silly things, it felt just really strange when I saw a lot of my traffic come from "love and relationship" keyword searches as well. Duh! Hahaha.

Well, here's HappySlip and her "Speechless" video, a follow-up to the "Boypren" video she did a few months back.



Uh, I'm speechless about a lot of things right now and my lips are sealed... a lot of times (hihihi). What about you?

Maybe

Note: I am writing this for two sets of friends :)

I am so utterly distracted by so many things going through my mind and I just had to get this off so I can focus on the stuff I need to prioritize.

So this is going to be one of my ten minute posts.

Maybe? It's always a question between guy and gal friendships. I think I must've lived long enough to experience quite a number of friendships that may or may not have ended in a romantic relationship.

What do I mean?

Remember Joey and Dawson (of Dawson's Creek)? They were friends since they were kids and eventually explored the romantic side of their friendship. Naging sila, but after so many seasons of going on and off they eventually accepted the fact that they weren't meant to be together. So Joey ended up with Pacey.

So is it really possible to have a guy best friend? I think so. I remember having this conversation with a friend while we were traversing EDSA. He asked me that question and I said that I think it is quite normal for opposite sex friendships to go through a time of "questioning". It's where you basically start thinking whether you'd end up together or something.

Yeah, it's a very sticky situation when one or both of you start thinking about it. I hate to admit it but it's usually girls who start thinking about it first. And, unfortunately for us girls it's the attention that gets to us. Give us extra special attention and we start mincing every single detail, SMS and gesture. We can't help it. It's our nature. Don't crucify us for it, help us out of it if you want us to be your buddy.

That's why I always tell my guy friends who get in such sticky situations to always, ALWAYS, be clear from the beginning. And I tell my girl friends never, NEVER to assume anything. (I guess that's why I am soooo dense). Never let that "Maybe" hang in the air coz eventually you'll start being awkward with each other blah blah blah. It's really fun though to have a guy best friend coz they always manage to give you real "guy perspectives" and they always cheer you up when you're sad. Do they ever make selos when there's a boyfriend? Nah, I don't think so, it's usually the boyfriend who ends up getting jealous. LOL.

Oh well, my ten minutes are up.

So, I ask you, is it really possible for a boy and a girl to just be friends? Without the "maybe"?

The "We" T-Shirt

Last night a friend of mine dropped a bombshell on us. She and her long-time boyfriend are splitting up. After fighting so hard for each other, they were calling it quits... well save for a last ditch effort they're going to do soon. Sigh, I do get stressed a lot over these things - it's easier to make a business plan!

After getting over the shock (coz we all thought everything was okay and lovey-dovey), she told a story about a friend who got proposed to at the Eiffel Tower. What was interesting about it was the guy came up with a customized shirt for the two of them with this:

Will You Marry Me? (in all the languages of the countries they toured in Europe)
Yes (also in all the languages of the countries they visited)

Egads. Ain't that really, really sweet? I wonder if my friends who are planning to get married would top that proposal?

Going back to my friend, she asked me to come up with some "We" t-shirt tags and this is for her:

He's got the hots for me.
She's got the hots for me.

He's sexy for me. (or use your TOE "My baby's sexy for me.)
She's sexy for me.

He makes me miss him.
She makes me miss her.

Will you be mine?
Yes, I'll be yours.

He's mine.
She's mine.

My lover boy.
My lover girl.

He loves me.
She loves me.

Can't live without him.
Can't live without her.

He lives for me.
She lives for me.

Forever is with him.
Forever is with her.

Argh! How'd I become so cheesy? Oh well... what do you think? Any ideas?

*Photo by my stylist-friend Sasha Manuel.

Boyfriend! Boypren! Jowa! Kasintahan!

Uh... I think someone can relate to this... Hilarious!

From HappySlip



And I loved the song!

Tales from a Cluttered Mind

I have a lot of things on my mind right now and it's basically mush! Mush! Mush! Mush!

And normally, to clear out the cobwebs in my mind I usually:
(1) move furniture around (I'll do that later, I need some muscle power!);
(2) buy curtains (scratch that, I'm kinda broke); or
(3) I write things down.

Okay, so let's go for number 3 since it doesn't cost anything. And it just takes me about 5 to 10 minutes to do a post anyway.

And these are the things I wanna unload:

(1) Work

... Secret! I got that figured out, so no worries.

(2) Life

If things were that easy. Then it's me, ME ME ME!!! Teach me how to jump then.

(3) Dieting - my diet regime

- no soda
- less rice
- fastfood, once a week only
- no ice cream, no cake - well maybe just a teeny bitty bit once a week
- afternoon tea
- stay at home!

I know, I should go and work-out or something, but I wanna go swimming! It's the only thing that works for me.

(4) 5 Songs I Listened to in my iTunes Today

Bakit Ngayon Ka Lang
Together in Electric Dreams
My Boo
We Could Be in Love
Lalala Means I Love You

Now... don't ask me why. LOL.

So, anything cluttering your mind?

Cebu Love Thoughts: How Will I Know He is The One?

Last night Janette and I stayed up until 4 a.m. discussing the merits of choosing “The One” (the right one that is).

How does one choose? And how does one know that the guy lurking around in your backyard is someone you could trust?

Of course, there’s my ideal guy checklist and there’s another list I have which is definitely not bloggable (let’s keep some things about my life to myself eh?). Bo Sanchez in his bestseller, “How to Find Your One True Love” said that you have to meet at least 5 guys every single week. In the past few months, I’ve been meeting that quota easily believe me. And let’s just say, I have made many, many new guy friends. Hehehe.

So how does one go about trusting a person? It is not natural for me to check-up on people. I don’t use a search engine nor Friendster to check-up on one’s background. I know, I know this should come naturally. Argh! I’m just so stupidly trusting (uh, that’s why I have 3 best friends looking after me?). Janette said, “It's all about risk management.” `Nuff said about that.

So let’s say you manage to determine that the person in the hot seat is someone you could trust and someone you’re considering. How long should you “play the game of chess”? (That was Punzi asking why it was going to take several months for me). So how long? Punzi chimed in a bit later on through Twitter that it shouldn’t be long. And Janette said that when you are in your 30s it’s a totally different ballgame because people know what they want and oftentimes don’t want to undergo the frilly, silly game called courtship.

So how will I know? I mean, it’s been a looooong time and I guess I’m kinda lost! LOL. So help me out here!

I’m tagging some married and single friends (and you if you wanna chime in as well) to provide me some thoughts on this matter: Tappy, Marc, Gail, Sasha, Anne, Harry, Janette (a reading perhaps? LOL), Manuel, Jozzua (I still owe you 1 meme!), Lady Cess, Sexy Mom, Noemi, Juned, Jayvee, Jun, Blogie, Andrew, Honey, Jay, Mayi, AJ, Sarah, Kristine, Max, Quistian, Markku.

The things Cebu does to me! LOL. Cheerios!

On Eskinitas, 80s Music and Love

Listening to music from the 80s while blogging offline here at the International Food Expo, World Trade Center.

Must keep awake. Must keep awake.

Last night at Markku’s invitation I attended the RockEd Radio-Pisay Keep Your Promises event was held Bigsky in E. Rodriguez, Quezon City. I thought it was really cool and productive for these individuals to hold such events. A few weeks ago they had a coastal clean-up at the Hundred Islands, Pangasinan. They are definitely having fun and helping other people as well.

After the event we were off to Eskinita. Eskinata is an alley full of bars and restos across the ABS-CBN compound. We went to a videoke bar owned by Joey Boy’s kumpare. What was interesting about the place was the “college” feel and uh the wannabes all dressed up waiting to be discovered. Sasha said that they should just go to Greenbelt or The Fort if they wanted to dress-up. LOL. Well, overall, it was still quite a fun place, most especially since the Pisay people were really down-to-earth.

Crazy for You. Now playing my dear friend. LOL. (Pun intended, sorry just being pilya).

Which brings me to some questions that have been brought to my attention from conversations I’ve had the past week with some friends:

1. In a relationship, who should you please more? Your partner or yourself? They all say that it should be a give-and-take relationship. Methinks it’s all about managing expectations and not being bratty. I don’t believe in “noisy” relationships. I don’t need that kind of stress.
2. If your partner has a very colorful past (or plainly, a past), how should you go about accepting that? Methinks that if you love someone you should accept his past, present and future. No judgments.
3. If you suffered a badly, beaten, broken heart, how should you go about mending it? Should you seek revenge by breaking each and every heart who comes across you? Should you stay single, not pursue a person even though it’s quite obvious you like her? I believe in taking the risk for the right person. If he’s worth it, why not? If you don’t then it’s either you’re a sissy or just plain selfish.

Well, what’s the hullabaloo about love anyway? Gawd, it’s been really a long time! LOL.

Thanks to Mum and Dad for being always being there.

Singleton Ranting

I spent the whole evening ranting to my best friend (and she did too).

Will my Fridays forever be relegated to a singles rant night?

I know it's been a long time since I've been in a relationship. I must admit I've been really cautious - in short, chicken! My ex-fiance came home recently after 4 years and I just basically ran off to the other side of the earth. Scared!

They say when you are single, you always long to be with someone.

And when you are married, you wish you were single.

The other side of the coin...

Friend #1 : SMS early this morning, "It's depressing to be a wife."

I thought, "You're husband's a great guy. He accepted us, your friends, without any qualms. His family might not be that great, but we're here for you. So why are you complaining?"

Friend #2: SMS a few weeks ago before she gave birth, "I'm leaving him!"

I thought, "What the??? You've been married for a year! You're lucky your kid has a Dad who will take on the responsibility! Keep your cool! It's just your hormones coz you're pregnant."

Friend #3: SMS also a few weeks ago, "I'm in a failing relationship."

I thought, "Dude, your relationship won't be failing if you were content and if you were loyal to your GF!"

Gawd, is the key to being happy being content with what you have? How come we always want something we don't have? And never ever content when we have what we actually wanted? Will we be really happy when we get what we want? Like Jackie and Ely?

When will I not be single? LOL.

Maybe when the right guy comes along. Asa pa. Hohumm. No comment.