Goodbye Heavy Baggage

I know I have been so morose the past few weeks. I have been feeling anxious about my health. To calm myself I meditate, pray, use essential oils and exercise. There is a belief that emotions could get you sick. "Intense fear and panic attacks can really make our blood clot and increase the risk of thrombosis or heart attack." That's from a study by the University of Bonn (source). 

I tried to process what happened yesterday before I went to sleep last night. I asked myself why I was so affected by getting rejected. I realized I've been carrying a lot of resentment in my heart. It's because of unmatched expectations. I need to better appreciate those who are giving me the support I need than expect from those who are not there for me. 

Expectations are the heaviest baggage you can carry. Sylvia Plath said, "If you expect nothing from somebody you are never disappointed." I resented the rejection yesterday because I expected to be treated differently. It will be better for me to let go of my expectations.

Chade-Meng Tan taught us an exercise when I attended his class. He said what's better than feeling grateful is being grateful for someone else. I thought about my friend whose daughter was in the ICU and intubated for over two weeks. I've been praying fervently for his daughter to get well. Yesterday he shared that his daughter is being discharged. The collective prayers of all his loved ones and community paid off. I felt so grateful for me. 

And that's what calmed me down last night. I shed tears of frustration through the process, but I felt so much better. I thanked God for healing my friend's daughter and started to pray for another friend who I found out has COVID-19. I'm hoping my personal prayers get answered too, but if not I'm sure God has a different plan for me. 

Let's all pray for each other my friends. 

Day 26 Minimalism Challenge, Get all your errands done. Yes! I have a lot of "online errands" to do today. I have to respond to the movers I reached out to and email my doctors. An angel also reminded me last night to get a second opinion regarding my vaccination. My to-do list today is quite long and I will make sure to finish it! 

CB///*Yr2/137 #StuckAtHomeDay/Yr2/160 #NewG309 #Home67 #StayHome #BeKind