Date Day with Myself

I woke up bright and early yesterday for an errand. Sweetie suggested the night before that I should buy my coffee after the errand. I was shocked! I usually rush back home after I go to a doctor appointment and Sweetie told me not to take any unnecessary risks. I was giddy when he suggested I pick up some coffee after my errand. 

I finished my errand early. I hung around a bit and thought about whether I should still go buy some coffee. The mall was still closed. I checked Google Maps to see if there was anything open already. Toast Box was already open. I decided to go. 

I did the required check-in and skipped going to Toast Box since it was too early for my favorite teh tarik. The smell of freshly baked bread encouraged me to sit down on the egg seats across BreadTalk. I sat there for 20 minutes just breathing in the smell of freshly baked bread (it goes through the mask nicely!). At 9:59am I went upstairs to the coffee shop and was surprised to see some customers having breakfast. 

I originally planned to just get a pack of coffee and then go home. My favorite craft shop though was still closed so I decided to get a cup of cappuccino and play Pokemon. I settled on a seat far away from other customers and played Pokemon in-between pinging Sweetie and Miggy. Eventually I quieted down and realized it's the first time in a long, long time since I dated myself. 

I usually go out with Sweetie because I still experience get shortness of breath when walking long distances. I have mastered the art of stopping whenever I start feeling breathless. Yesterday I felt a little bold and went to Art Friend after I finished my coffee (Spotlight was still closed). I needed to buy some supplies. I was so happy walking up and down the aisles. There's just something about being in a craft shop that brings me so much joy. 

After Art Friend I took the lift back to the fifth floor and dropped by Spotlight. I went around to check out some fabric. I didn't get anything (the boys said it was a miracle!). I was just happy for the opportunity to visit my favorite shop. I was a bit tired by then though so I didn't stay long. I was already happy from the short date time with myself so I went home after visiting Spotlight. 

When was the last time you dated yourself?

Day 10 Gratitude Challenge, A Person in Your Family. I've always talked about how grateful I am for my immediate family. My Mom has a set of cousins who lived with us when I was growing up. Tita Olive took care of me (and all of my cousins and nephews and nieces, of course Miggy too). She's known as the family baby whisperer. If you look through our family photos she was always carrying a baby. Then there's Tita Alon. I don't remember if she lived with us, but she was always there at home. She always accompanied my Mom whenever she had to go to Bicol. Tita Chu in Sydney is my most adventurous Tita. I would always meet up with her whenever I visit Australia. She always tells me stories about our family (I missed out a lot because I'm the youngest). And there's Tita Pet who lives in Japan. I remember following her around when I was a child. I have a special bond with her, we always feel whenever the other is in trouble or sick. Each of my titas play a different role in my life. They're just always there for me and I always look forward being able to spend time with them. Did I mention that the four are sisters? :')

CB///*Yr2/97 #StuckAtHomeDay/Yr2/124 #NewG349 #Home107 #StayHome #BeKind 

Self-Love: the Journey Back to Me

 It's the month of love and it's my new year! So I thought I'd move on now to how I want the rest of my year to be. I want the rest of my year to be full of love and I want to create more happy memories. 

Woke up early today to get my meds and breakfast out of the way. After that I worked on Sweetie's shampoo and then cleared out the kitchen trolley. I did those to understand my limits for now. I was exhausted before eleven so I retreated to the couch. I chanced upon this video by Bo Sanchez -

It got me thinking and I realized I really need to work on myself. In the past ten years since I moved to Singapore I gave up a huge part of my life. I failed to replenish my happiness tank. From watching Bo's video I realized I must not like myself too much because I put myself in this situation. I'm not going to dwell on it and will focus on healing. Here's what Bo advised to like yourself better -

"1 - Say no to toxic people; 2 - Activate your core needs; 3 - Change your self-dialogue; and 4 - Start  telling yourself what God tells you in the Word."

Today is my new year and this is the start of my journey back to me. 

And today's self-love comes in the form of a cupcake! Haha. 

CB///298 #StuckAtHomeDay/328 #StayHome #BeKind

You are Always Worth It

 "Be worth love, and love with come." - Louisa May Alcott

I'd like to think I'm in a better place today than I was a few days ago. I go through a roller coaster of emotions whenever I get sick. My seatmate asked me once how I cope when I get sick. He asked me this question after having a flu. He said he can't imagine how I cope again and again when I get sick. 

It's a struggle. The moment I feel pain I start getting sucked in a black hole. It went really bad last year, I had to take a break (it is probably PTSD). One thing I was told I needed to do was to love myself. It took awhile, but I eventually learned the reason why I had to do that for myself. 

(Source: LoveYourselfPH)

My doctor called me several times today. He had been studying my tests and took time to explain things to me. I told him I really appreciate the effort he put in connecting the dots and giving me advise on what to do next. He said, "You have suffered enough and you are a nice person. You are worth it." 

My heart is full. I am so grateful to my doctor for putting in so much effort to read the reports. It gave me so much hope and the strength to keep fighting. Thank you my dear doctor <3 

For my friends who are also struggling, please always remember... you are worth it. And thank you to all my family and friends who have been reaching out to check on me and to pray for me. I really appreciate it. <3 <3 

#CB//216 #StuckAtHomeDay/246 #WFH145 #StayHome #BeKind

The Right to Say No

Saying no is one of the most difficult things for me to do. I learned it the hard way last year when I melted away like a candle. I eventually had to take a break to rest and recover. 

I am a prolific multitasker. Redundant noh? Yes, that's how bad I am. I thrive when I'm busy. I'm perennially multitasking. I'm watching a YouTube video right now while blogging. Maybe I have two brains hahaha. But this is precisely why I got burnt out. I always have piles of things I need to do. Eventually I got tired and was recommended to take a break. 

In the last 14 years I only take breaks during Christmas. Normally I only use half of my VLs every year and then it gets carried over to the next year. I oftentimes get a notification from HR around November that I should take a break hahaha. Am I a workaholic? Perhaps I am, but I usually end work before sunset and I don't log-in until the next day. 

Today I had to say no. It was really hard for me and I felt bad. I shouldn't have felt bad. While browsing videos to watch I came across this video by celebrity host Boy Abunda. It was a good reminder for me that I have every right to say no. Watch the video here -

Do you find yourself getting stressed a lot? Perhaps you need to think about your priorities and whether you are committing to so many things. For me it came to a point where I was disappointed in myself because I felt I rendered myself unproductive. That's how you feel when the quality of your output is affected. I was so frustrated today because I shouldn't have felt bad about saying no. I'm proud of myself though because I was able to say no, I just need to work on reminding myself that I love myself and that it was for my own good. 

What about you? Do you struggle to say no?

#CB//204 #StuckAtHomeDay/234 #WFH139 #StayHome #BeKind