Road Trip!

I've wanted to go on a roadtrip for awhile now. There's been no good time for it since we're busy with other things. Last Saturday, I asked the boys if they wanted to go out of town. We were undecided since Typhoon Francisco was set to arrive.

We made the decision to proceed on Monday night since the weather forecast showed a low chance of rain. We left around 9 in the morning on Tuesday and took the short trip to Tagaytay. We headed first to eat brunch at Bag of Beans. The usual branch from Twin Lakes we used to visit moved to their own place. It's now called Charito and Antonio Bag of Beans which overlooks the Splendido area. 

After brunch, we headed to Sonya's Garden to buy some bread. We also love eating there, but since it's been 3 years since we last visited Tagaytay we split our time across what we wanted to see. Well, we spent more at Sonya's than for brunch since we got some pasalubong for our friends (haha). We agreed we won't wait long to go back, haha. 

And then we went to our other favorite place, Mahogany Market, to buy fruits, veggies and some plants. We got dragon fruit, banana, avocado and dalandan. I was happy to buy some dalandan so I can make my annual Spanish adobo. Sweetie got some veggies since my kitchen is open again (it's not so hot anymore to cook!). 

I managed to control myself and just got "a few" plants, haha. Just some marigold and Gumamela (hehe). I'll try to re-pot them in the next few days. We're starting to look like a jungle now. Mom would be pleased. 

Going on a road trip felt like a reset. We all needed it since we've been busy with home and health stuff. It's a never ending cycle, so it was a good break. We couldn't do overnight trips anymore since we have 8 fur kids who will get mad at us. A whole day trip to Tagaytay is a good idea. Maybe next month we could go to Binan again to buy some Chef RV goodies! 

#BeKind #StaySafe

43 Years Ago

Forty three years ago, I was a flower girl for my Tita Pet and Uncle Fumio's wedding. My cousin, Tina, was also a flower girl.

It's been more than 4 decades, but what I remember most was the huge cake made by a neighbor. The wedding was organized together with the community.

We almost lost Tita Pet. I remember seeing her sick at home and I promptly reported it to my Mom. To make a long story short, she was the first successful kidney transplant in the country. It was a miracle that only happened because of community support.

*That's me showing affection to my Tita (or maybe I was being my pakielamerang self)

And that's where I started to believe the importance of being a part of a community. They will be with you in good times and bad times. Until today, I see the love the community has given to my Tita even though she's far away from us.

#BeKind #StaySafe

Happy Birthday Sweetie!

Happy, happy birthday Sweetie!

May the Lord bless you and grant all your prayers. Let's stay healthy 😺 

#BeKind #StaySafe

Family Haircut Day

Sweetie said he wanted to get a haircut before his birthday, so I declared a family haircut day. The last haircut I had a few months ago reminded me why I never went back to that salon (LOL). I grew my hair a bit longer so I could have it properly cut. 

Anyway, after trying out a relatively new place near us, we headed to the salon I used to frequent. It's a different branch, but I figured they probably cut the same way. I'm glad I took the chance with this branch since it's nearby. I hope it will be our go-to salon from now on since I've been orphaned for a couple of years now.

I just had my hair trimmed. I don't need anything fancy since I don't go out often anyway, plus I don't want to shock my cats with a new look (haha). I also skipped having bangs. It just annoys me to no end. Good ol' haircut for now. 

It was Miggy who had the biggest change. I think the hair stylist cut at least 20 inches of his hair. That amount of hair can help clean up oil from the sea! I was also asked whether I wanted to keep my hair. The hair stylist said it can be made into bangs! Maybe next time! Haha. 

#BeKind #StaySafe

Happy Sunday Y'all

Today was Pope Leo XIV's inaugural :)

At home we realized we needed a couple of things from the grocery. Sweetie and I made a last minute decision to make a grocery run.

Miggy decided to stay home and so Sweetie and I had an instant date. We just had merienda. We always make sure to have happy tummies before doing groceriea. It helps us stick to the list! Hehe.

Have a blessed Sunday everyone!

#BeKind #StaySafe

What I Got from my Grandfather

The only I ever "saw" my Papa Lolo was when he said hello to me from a window. I was four years old and we were in Tito Mom's house in San Francisco. Kuya and I were fighting about the thermostat and I went to the window by the stairs to feel the cold glass. 

Papa Lolo suddenly appeared by the window and said hello. I responded out loud and said, "Hello Papa Lolo!" After that I was suddenly snatched up by someone (probably my Mom or Dad). And they nervously asked me who I talking to. I told them Papa Lolo was outside.

I still remember that day like it was yesterday and I still remember how cold it was in the house. The same "apparition" only happened once again. This time it was Gabby who saw him in Mama Lola's room in our home. Gabby ran back to where we were in the lanai and said he saw an old man in an all white military uniform. Yup, definitely Papa Lolo.

Anyway, I discovered something about my Papa Lolo. I found letters to Mama Lola and a planner. In 1969, my Papa Lolo wrote daily on the small planner what he did and who he met. In the planner was a raffle ticket, fund computations, and a photo of his brother.  His letters to Mama Lola and children were also very detailed (usually bilins and instructions). 

I also found my old planners from the 90s on the same day. I got curious and looked through the planners to see what kind of person I was back then. Oh boy, I was so OC!!! Aside from daily lists of what I did, I had birthdays of practically everyone I knew written on the planner. I used colored pens to represent where I know them from. 

Now I know where I got that "quirk" from. It wasn't my Mom since what she had is a gazillion address books (I filled a whole box of it!). I also write like Papa Lolo. Detailed and chronological.

*Long before I was born

How I wish I met my Papa Lolo. My Mom always told me happy stories about him. I know he wasn't perfect, but his letters and planners showed how much he cared for his family, especially his children. 

This tiny bit of information about my Papa Lolo makes me happy. I never met him in person since he passed away five years before I was born. Knowing I got my OC-ness from him makes me feel less odd about my quirk. :)

#BeKind #StaySafe

FamBam Sunday

Finally did our usual Sunday afternoon lakwatsa today. We were supposed to do groceries the other day, but we weren't able to go out for a number of reasons (#signsofoldage). 

We were happy when we saw a new resto open where we sometimes do our groceries. We decided to try it out since they had a good menu of mostly Filipino food. The food was good, but next time we'll just have our usual coffee at Starbucks.

We were able to get most of what was on our grocery list. I just need to buy some meds next time in my usual drugstore. It was a good day to step out. 

Happy Sunday everyone. Hope you had a restful weekend.

#BeKind #StaySafe

Almost 40 Years in the Making

I was wiped out last night after hosting a family dinner with balikbayang, Tito Butch and Tita Jenny. Kuya was the one who organized it though and we just hosted it at home. 

It was a get together that took almost 40 years in the making. I was only 12 the last time I saw Tito Butch. We visited him in Arizona the year Ate was married. And all this time he just stayed in the US. 

It was a good get together. We caught up on a myriad of things. We all got so full from the Filipino set I ordered from Alba's catering. Kuya added some lechon manok and baboy and Miggy served his leche flan. 

I heard there are more relatives coming for a visit. Maybe we could have a bigger reunion then. We haven't had one for a long time now. 

Today, I decided to spend a bit more time outdoors. I felt I needed more fresh air and sunlight. I trimmed some of my plants and battled the caterpillars again. Really need to be consistent to make sure they don't multiply. Also, spent a bit of time with the cats.

How was your weekend?

Life in Frames

I finally got around to sorting my Mom's picture frames. She had a lot scattered around the house. I plan to scan the photos. Miggy helped me get the photos out of the frames. Some had surprises since Mom apparently changed photos and would leave the old one at the back. I also found a handwritten family tree.

A vlogger mentioned once in their vlog that you'll probably be forgotten in x number of decades after you die. I guess it's true. Only a curious descendant will probably bother to look through old photos. 

I realized while going through the frames that my Mom displayed important family moments. There were at least two boxes of frames and I took photos of a few of them (I'm not sure when I'll be able to scan the photos!). Here's a few --

Mom's parents and siblings 

Mom at sweet sixteen 

My high school grad pic

My college graduation with Br. Andrew :)

Mom and her beautiful garden

Miggy and me

Miggy with my Mom and Dad

My Emerging Influential Blogs award for this blog

The only picture frame from my bedroom that survived Typhoon Ondoy

These are just a few of the photos my Mom had on display. It showed us through the years. She also has a huge collection of photo albums which I plan to scan. Oh boy, that's going to really take a lot of time. Let's see where this goes.

#BeKind #StaySafe

Healing Your Inner Child

I was a child when my siblings left the nest. I am 16 and 13 years younger than them and they were adults by the time I started going to school.

It was not unusual for me that they were out most of the time. My parents had a rule that everyone had to be home by sunset. We were always complete for dinner, Sunday mass and lunch. I spent my days with my parents, Mama Lola or my yaya. We also had family outings every so often. We usually went to Bicol once a year.

The dynamics changed just before the EDSA Revolution. My siblings one after the other left home and got married within a span of 3 years. At that time I'd exchange snail mail with my sister until it dwindled to hurried long distance calls. I'd see my brother usually for Christmas. He'd either come home with his family or we'd fly in to see him.

Nothing out of the ordinary since that was the circumference we were in. It wasn't their fault they were born ahead and I came in very fashionably late. My sister did say once during my rebellious years that it was her fault she wasn't around for me. I told her there's no problem since the circumstance was just oddly normal.

I went on with my life and eventually my family was only complete physically again on my wedding day. The next time was when Dad got sick and then once after Mom passed away.

When I had counseling my doctor tried to help me figure out what was wrong. We didn't get to it since I felt I was fortified enough already and it was time for me to go back home. I thought I was fine, but dealing with the helper who emptied my Mom's savings, filing the case, making sure we were all safe and seeing my Mom change a lot after we got home, took a toll on me. 

I probably had an undiagnosed heart attack or a broken heart. My cardiologist refused to have tests done on me and just sent me home with increased dosage of my meds (I changed doctors after that). It took many months before I felt better. I cried everyday. I'm very lucky and grateful my boys were there for me.

It was then that I realized I was suffering from abandonment issues. My inner child never understood why my siblings left me. It got worse when they eventually couldn't see eye to eye. Dealing with fire and ice was an impossible situation. I talked to my Mom about it a lot and she advised me to just stop talking to them. She said it's their issue, they're adults and they should resolve it themselves. 

I followed her advise and only reached out to them on the day she died. I refused to see them until they had a ceasefire. We got together on my Dad's birthday. How things unfolded isn't what my parents would have wanted, but it is what it is.

I was lucky I had spiritual guidance from a dear Nun. I had prayed for many years to have someone like Br. Gene again. She guided me how best to get through things. I eventually also read that the only way to heal your inner child is to do it yourself. 

My inner child has accepted the fact that things will never be the same. The situation wasn't ideal and they have established their lives elsewhere. The best recourse for me is to just move forward and focus on those who are here for me. Through the years I had been blessed with many friends who have been like brothers and sisters to me. I keep a small circle of trust and they provide me a safe space, plus I have my boys. 

I was told once that I felt that way because I cared so much. It would have been useful to be told to live myself, protect my peace and focus on what's in front of you.

#BeKind #StaySafe

Birthdays

Celebrated Sweetie and Miggy's birthdays last June. We decided to invite a few friends for lunch. It's been my dream to eat Alba's porchetta again. Kuya sent me one for my birthday last year. One order is too much for the three of us, but perfect for a small group. I let the boys select a package from Alba's and that's what we feasted on for lunch. 

Here's what we feasted on:

For decorations, I just got a banner. I even got art paper because I thought I'd have time to cut out their names. We were so busy organizing the house I forgot to make time to cut the names. Good thing I got a happy birthday sign and some banderittas. It even came with lights! I had my friends help with the balloons. 

The lunch stretched to early evening since we had a lot of catching up to do. It was a fun and chill afternoon where we learned more about coffee, making Thai milk tea, and cheese. Note to self: don't prepare salad at home. Just order, if needed. 

Thank you to our friends who came to celebrate with us! <3 <3

#BeKind #StaySafe

Grateful

I was thinking about my family the past few days and realized that we only have Sweetie's Dad left. We're almost orphans now. My siblings are also mostly abroad, so it's just us. I have my cousins, but they all live in other cities. We both don't have relatives where we live, but we have a lot of friends I grew up with in the neighborhood. 

My stupor changed when I realized I should be grateful. We have additions in the family! My cousin and niece gave birth in the past two months. I have a kalokalike who was born last year (poor baby, I hope she didn't get my temperament!). We lost our parents, titos and titas in the past decade, but our family continues to grow. My pamangkins are also set to marry in the coming months. 

I'm set to make this month different. We will finish fixing our living room and dining room so we can have friends over. My boys are having their birthdays this month. We haven't planned anything yet and just playing it by ear for now. I'm still trying to gauge whether I could muster up the strength to entertain, haha. Well, we'll see. I do want to celebrate though. 

I'm also grateful that we have our cat family. They've been a joy. The cat distribution system gave us six stay-in cats plus 2 who come in and out. They have been living harmoniously, except when Brimsley is having a bad day. She seems to have forgotten about her kittens and doesn't want them near her. She's allowed us to pet her lately and rubs against Miggy's legs often. 

#BeKind #StaySafe

Daddy Daughter Dates

We've been watching Young Sheldon for awhile now. I'm really glad it's on Netflix already. I had previously watched parts of it whenever I traveled (SQ ftw!). We re-started watching from season 1 and one of the really cute episodes was when George brough Missy for a daddy daughter date. She even dressed as a princess. 

Pasacao, 70s.

The episode reminded me of my daddy-daughter dates with my Dad. We would usually head to Quad and eat at his favorite restaurant, Ling Nam. He would usually get beef noodles and siopao. At that time I was still very picky with what I eat, so I would eat the siopao skin. Daddy didn't like it and I'd eat it. We did that until I eventually appreciated eating the whole siopao. 

Those dates extended to indulgences. It was Dad who bought me my very first cassette tape, Michael Jackson's Thriller album! Eventually I discovered McDonald's. Mom never allowed me to buy happy meals, but Dad would always indulge me. On Sundays, Dad would always buy me a Twin Popsies after hearing mass.

Fond core memories I treasure. Sweetie gives me the skin of his siopao whenever we eat. I still eat Twin Popsies whenever it's available (I think they call it Twin Pops now). I just got an orange one the other day from Makati Supermart. It used to be one of our go-to places when it was still in Makati. Dad and I would usually exit the supermart whenever Mom took so long and we'd eat spaghetti there. 

Miss you Dad <3

Happy EDSA Anniversary! 

#BeKind #StaySafe

Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas

While preparing macaroni salad yesterday, Sweetie started to play the piano. He began with "Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas". I started to tear up because it's one of Mom's favorite Christmas songs. She would always listen to a radio station that only played songs from their era. "Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas" always played on that station and Mom would increase the volume. 

This is the first Christmas we're celebrating without Mom. December had always been a busy month for us since Mom, Tito Tony, Kuya Koko and Tito Ben would celebrate their birthdays. Then there's Kuya and Ate Joy's anniversary, plus our wedding anniversary. Since we got home we'd always celebrate Mom's birthday with her favorite food. And there has to be cake. She preferred celebrating at home than going out. Then there would be noche buena, Christmas day and media noche and New Year.

Last Christmas with Mom. 

Last year, it was very hard to convince Mom to celebrate her birthday and Christmas. She was just not in the mood for it. She still came to hear mass with us and eat, but her mood was very different. It was very unusual since she loved to eat especially if you provided her favorite drink, Coca Cola (original only please). 

And now she's gone. She would want us to celebrate as usual, so that's why I broke down preparations for noche buena across two days. Didn't buy any softdrinks since she's the only one who drinks it. We didn't get any gifts for ourselves since we got busy with me being hospitalized and recovery. We only got gifts for our support teams. I told family and friends I'm a month delayed with my to-do list, so gifts were affected. What's important anyway is we have each other. 

Just celebrating at home (as usual). No get togethers for now since I'm still recovering, plus it's too risky to go out. Hopefully, the boys will be happy with our noche buena spread. I'm cooking enough food so we have leftovers until Christmas day. 

Merry Christmas everyone. 

#BeKind #StaySafe

Life Cycle, Dealing with Loss

When my Dad passed away, Mom told me, "Ganyan talaga ang buhay." I cried harder because I also remembered other loved ones who passed away. It was hard and I wondered how Mom could be so matter of fact. She handled loss very well and was our pillar when Dad passed away. She did everything efficiently while I kept bawling my eyes out. 

After losing Dad, my titos and tita followed one year after another. It reinforced what Mom told me. It's a life cycle. She faced loss with so much grace and dignity. Mom continued to be steadfast and strong. I learned from her how to accept loss. 

We all go through grief differently. The first two months after Mom died I was very unmotivated and unproductive. By the third month I realized I had to start moving. I focused on our family's health. We spent every week in the hospital for consultations and tests. The boys did PT and I'm soon going to start pulmonary rehab. 

I worked on our health because I realized I have to get going in order to meet my main goal. I retired because I want to be able to make more happy memories with my boys. We've been spending majority of our time just home and I want to be able to do things for them like cook and do my share of house chores. And I hope we can step out of the house every so often. 

Live and make more happy memories. That's what my parents would want me to do. 

Happy Sunday everyone!

Lakwatsera Fridays: Grocery Run

We haven't gone out the whole month except for errands. I just ordered online whatever we needed for groceries. I asked Sweetie if we could buy some milk at Lander's. We all needed a break and I thought some cardio in a store would help.

Promptly got stuck in traffic when we went out. We coped by spinning Pokestops and catching Pokemon. It was a good 30 minutes when we finally got out of Bicutan. It just took a few more minutes to reach Lander's.

The sky was really pretty when we arrived. We chose a good time because foot traffic was low. We just basically "window" shopped and just picked up a few things we needed. Too bad we were a day early for the Piso sale.

Capped off the outing by trying out the food. The pasta was quite good and Miggy liked the chicken roll he ordered. I have to remember though to keep away from their coffee drinks. Seems I'm allergic to the milk they use. It was a good family day :)

#BeKind #StaySafe 

First Night in Our Dream House

We moved to our new home yesterday! This is the final phase of our transition back home. As usual, we're scrambling to find things we need in the boxes that arrived the other day. It's part of the fun of moving to a new home. Sweetie and I learned a few things last year when we moved. We ended up going through a maze of boxes to find beddings and bed clothes. This time around we made a list! 

We always wanted to live in a house. It was our dream from the beginning. Circumstances though had us move from one place to another in the past 12 years. Doing that eventually made us yearn to find a permanent home. The past three years our past time was to look at property listings and watch Presello vids. We would look at the houses and assess whether it would fit our needs. 

Welcome home Stormtrooper!

We knew we had outgrown our first owned home. SLEX was also nearby and the pollution forced us to keep all the windows closed. We were also worried about living in the condo because there were several COVID-19 case surges at our place. We saw a few places that we found interesting, but we really wanted to go back to the place where I grew up. 

I saw a listing last year, but the price was way over budget. Fast forward to May this year, I saw the place listed again. I kept coming back to the listing because it looked like it would be perfect for us. Eventually I found a video of the house on YouTube and was even more fascinated. Sweetie liked it too. We didn't consider it because it was beyond reach. The strange thing is we started to imagine how we'd live in it. I started to pray because I could see us living in the house. 

When things are really meant to be, God will make a way. In late June, I saw the listing again. The price was reduced by 16%. Still too pricey I thought, so I moved on and tried looking for another place. Then I saw the listing again listed by a friend, Ate Maya. I've known her since I was a teenager since she's my choir mate. I pinged her and asked about the house. After some negotiations to further reduce the price, several family meetings and a gazillion prayers, we got the place!

The funny thing is Sweetie and I only saw our new home after we got home and finished our quarantine. How crazy is that noh? Yes, it was really a crazy decision, but we felt it was the right decision for our family. We prayed hard for a permanent home and finally found it. God really leads you to where He wants you to be. :)

P.S. We slept on the floor, haha.

#Home31 #NewG215 #Xmas21 #StayHome #BeKind   

Nesting

We became empty nesters in late 2019 when Miggy decided to go back home after graduating. We felt lost for a long time. I remember Sweetie and I would stay out as late as we could to avoid going back to an empty home. It was hard and was probably one of the reasons why I had to take a break back then. 

We tried to extend Miggy's visa when he brought me back to Singapore in 2020. The government became stricter though and he ended up going home in late February. He went home just before the lockdown started. Thus started the 22 month time apart. It literally broke me. 

For almost two years we subsisted with daily check-ins via chat. We tried to make it fun by outdoing each other with good night memes. What we missed most were the hugs and Miggy would tuck us in at night and turn off our lights. We had a lot of mundane family rituals which was important to all of us. 

Watch our emotional reunion at the end.

Now that we're back home we just automatically started doing our daily rituals. We were definitely not ready when Miggy left the nest in 2019 and being apart because of the pandemic made things worse. Now I'm thinking, maybe the extreme stress from work and being apart is what made me sick. My doctors warned me that going home does not mean I'm going to get well instantly. I know that. I think half the battle is making my family complete again. 

Good thing Miggy missed us too! Haha. Things are settling nicely at home. I have made progress with cleaning up the kitchen. I can start cooking again soon. I hope the La Germania service crew can fix my stove. Also need to have our sliding door locks fixed since the heat broke it again. We got our tiny place 8 years ago and this is the first time we're living in it permanently. There's a lot of things here and there that needs fixing. 

Some things I learned through the years on maintaining a home:

1. Get professional cleaners to help every so often. We also get the mattresses and couch cleaned. 

2. When appliances break down, it's best to course the service request through the brand service center. It's been so far easy to get help by booking for help online, i.e. La Germania, Carrier. 

3. If you live in a condo, it helps to be nice to the staff. We had a gazillion luggages when we arrived and we bumped into the maintenance crew. They willingly helped us bring everything up. They've also been helpful to Miggy the whole time we were away. If you have a good relationship with the maintenance crew they can also help with disposing pre-loved items. 

And on the food front, here's what I had yesterday -

Quickmelt cheese and Lady's Choice mayonnaise combo sandwich - I initially freaked out when I learned about this from my busmate. I fell in love with it when I tried it. Super missed it since Quickmelt is hard to find in SG. 

McDonald's spaghetti! 

Army Navy hungarian sausage. We're still doing the rounds of ordering food we've missed. Will start cooking next week hehe. 

The best merienda though was the kutsinta we bought from our neighbor. For the first time we didn't have an kakanin leftovers! Haha. 

Annnddd my first Shopee purchase was Serioso Chili Garlic! Heehee. Try it gais!

#Home10 #NewG234 #Xmas42 #StayHome #BeKind  

What I Miss Most

I dreamt of my nephews and nieces last night. We were, as usual, eating at a buffet. Whenever I get to see them we automatically head to a buffet. It's been awhile since I've seen them since they're located in different cities now. 

Oh how I miss my family and our food adventures. The kids though are all grown up now. Some have started their own families. I guess I was feeling a bit lonely last night because it's almost two years since I've seen family. 

It was a good thing I was able to have two family reunions before I headed back to Singapore last year. Got to meet my cousin's bf-now-fiance. My tita from Australia was also in town. I also got to meet my cousin's apo from the US. It was a great pre-pandemic good memories pabaon. 

I'm really so relieved that my doctor allowed me to get vaccinated. I was facing the possibility of living a hermit life and that thought was depressing. I experienced the usual symptoms post-vaxx, but that's okay at least now I'm protected. That also means we could probably have mini-reunions when things get better. 

And hopefully see my nephews and nieces again soon. 

CB///*Yr2/167 #StuckAtHomeDay/Yr2/190 #NewG280 #Home39 #Xmas91 #StayHome #BeKind

My Dream Life

Day 1 Gratefulness Challenge: One of my goals for this second half of the year is to be more grateful. I found a 30-day gratefulness challenge and will integrate it here in my blog. Day 1 challenge is to be grateful about your body. I am truly grateful that my body has been able to withstand so many issues. Even my doctors are amazed and they keep telling me I am blessed. Thank you Papa God <3

To be honest, I never dreamt of moving to another country. It was never in my plan. It happened at the insistence of my former managers. I was able to enjoy it only when my family moved to Singapore. My dream life is just to be with my family. Ideally I want everyone to be within physical reach. I say that because my family is scattered across the globe. 

I grew up with extended family living in our home. My Mama Lola and several Titas lived with us. There was a time my Tito and his family stayed with us when their house burned down. I was a happy child because I had additional mommies and daddies. Our Christmas reunions were always big and rowdy. I long for those days. 

So my dream life is to be back home, have a home with enough space to have get-togethers with family and friends, have time and energy to create more memories and be able to help where I can. My prayer every night is to be safe, secure, healthy and blessed. 

"It's never too late to focus on your dreams."

CB///*Yr2/84 #StuckAtHomeDay/Yr2/111 #NewG362 #Home136 #StayHome #BeKind