I'm happy to share that my mind and soul is in a better place now. The past six months has been horrendous for me mentally. There's a lot of things that contributed to falling back into the ugly pit. I had a hard time sleeping, I was unproductive, I couldn't be pushed to do anything and, most of all, I didn't want to see anybody else except my boys.
I've been in this place before and the biggest contributing factor was bad health and being overworked. I got help and bid goodbye to my doctor just before we went home. He warned me that the change may be too much and I could just holler if I needed him. I thought I didn't since there were times I was okay. I usually equate that I'm fine when I'm productive.
And it's clearer to me now what sets me off. It's mostly my health. I thought about reaching out to my doctor, but I told myself I needed to respond to this challenge. If I'm able to win the challenge, I'd be able to change how I react whenever I have an issue. I prayed and slowly ramped up my activities.
One night I prayed and told the negative vibe to leave me. I woke up early and was surprised when I felt lighter. I felt like my old self and that week I was able to return to my weekly pulmo rehab. I was shaky and had asthma, but I was able to push through and finish the session. I was also able to complete some paperwork that had been waiting to be done. I also resumed sorting stuff.
I turned the corner with prayer and continued to do activities that help me cope. I realized I'll be able to move forward only by moving on and doing what needs to be done. It's easier for me to create programs, run events, develop solutions, but I fail miserably at staying put and being happy. My goal is to make more happy memories with my boys and that's what I'll focus on.
#BeKind #StaySafe
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