Stay Safe

I finally saw a doctor today. She had me take an antigen test. It was thankfully negative and I likely picked up a viral infection last Monday that's why I've been having fever the past few days. I just started taking meds.

Heard a number of people around me have been infected with the coronavirus. Do take care and be cautious. Always wear a mask!

Mom

I haven't been feeling well since yesterday morning, so just posting the schedule for Mom's funeral and interment:

#BeKind #StaySafe

What to Say When Someone Sends Their Condolences

My Mom's helper chided me for thanking her when she sent her condolences. She said don't say thank you because it's like you welcomed the loss. I asked the funeral director how does one respond when someone sends their condolences. He told me there is a pamahiin that you shouldn't say thank you. He advised to instead to say you appreciate it or just say sige or okay. 

Daddy would say though that you should be happy when your loved one dies. It means they have finished their mission on earth and have been called home by God. He said this to me multiple times a few years before he passed away. He had a very different view of death and said that you should look forward to it. When he got sick, he said he finished his mission already and was looking forward to going home. Of course, I'd be very upset whenever he told me this. 

I only understood what he meant to teach me when i experienced a number of illnesses that could have taken me away. He is right, one must rejoice in life and death. Papa God is showing you His love either way. My cousin will probably tell me, di ka masaya kakwentuhan, but as Mom taught me. It's the circle of life. 

I chose Mom's photo above to be printed for the funeral. It is a candid photo since she never really liked taking posed photos.  She was also in her favorite space at home, in the lanai where she could see her garden. It's also where she would entertain her friends and where we would eat. She probably liked it there because that's where Dad would sit across her. Oh well Ma, enjoy forever with Dad. 

#BeKind #StaySafe

Dear Mom

Dear Mom,

I woke up to the news that you were gone. I had a feeling it was coming and I have been distressed about it the past few months. When Tita Letty called and told me, she was so distraught I slipped into how you trained me. When Dad left us, you told me it's a fact of life and I just have to live with it. I was so emotional, I was useless and you took care of everything. 

I'm a little cuckoo because you had me when you were 39. Latak as Daddy says.

I sat on the bed and tried to remember what you taught me and realized you did not teach me what to do. We sought the help of friends to figure out what to do. All I knew was you wanted to be laid to rest beside Daddy and to do it on a glorious mystery day. A few neighbors offered to help find a doctor, but everyone was out. Well, we eventually figured it out 

I have not cried. I know you'd be proud of me for being unemotional. I guess I've been emotional enough the past few months. I wanted you to stay with me, but you preferred to stay in your house. You wanted your freedom and well I haven't been well. You kept saying I inherited all your and Dad's illnesses. I would respond by saying because you both love me so much. 

I always thought I had more photos with Daddy, only noticed this cute one now.

I know you woke me up in the wee hours of the morning yesterday. I was having palpitations and was starting to feel numb. I worried about you and just prayed you're okay. Fell asleep again and woke up when Tita Letty called. I know you woke me up because I had to move. I found out though that you were trying to make a call, but God said it was time for you to go home. 

I was heat sensitive since birth, haha.

The next few days will be rough. I am trying to keep things together. Kuya will take care of the funeral and Ate will arrive on Friday. Please watch over us Mom and say hi to Dad from me. I know you're around because I've been smelling your scent all over the house. Don't worry, you trained me well. I got this. 

Love you Mom and will miss you. 

xoxo,

Aileen 

For those who wish to pay their last respects, wake will be from May 3, 2023, 5pm to Friday night at Manila Memorial Park. Inurment will be on Saturday, 9am. Please kindly wear a mask when you visit. Thank you. 

#BeKind #StaySafe

Mom has Gone to Heaven

My beautiful Mom has gone to heaven. 

Sunday Miracles: Simple Joys

To be honest, I always have difficulty writing my Sunday posts. It forces me to take stock of I lived in the past week and sometimes that triggers my anxiety. When that happens I remind myself not to measure my productivity based on how I used to be. I also remind myself to focus on being grateful. 

This week I was reminded to be grateful for simple joys. We started taking Ningxia again and I think that has helped me gain more energy. I'm working on taking better care of myself and my boys and part of it is working on what we eat. I'm also pushing myself to move more.

Spent the week decluttering. I realized I cannot do it in one go, so I followed a friend's advise to trim it down. I also followed our coach Ally's advise to sort things first. I trimmed down a couple of crates and boxes this week and will get back to it once we clear out the rest of the boxes. I also sorted my books and was happy to see the progress we made trimming it down. The books we donated went to Bicol.

With the temp a bit more controlled at home now, I hope I'll be able to cook more with Miggy. Simple joys like being able to do more at home make me happy. 

Healing comes from Him, don't forget to recognize small improvements. Be always grateful and focus on your goals. 

#BeKind #StaySafe

Plantita Saturdays: Backyard Refresh!

Things weren't going right for our garden. Experienced flooding, all the grass died and nothing seemed to flourish, even the bamboo trees started to look sad. With all the grass gone, it soon became muddy and it became harder to keep the sliding doors clean. A huge rat also burrowed and we got scared it might gain entry to the house. 

After a month of work, the drainage issue has been addressed. The bamboo and other plants has been corralled. We were lucky that the foreman who led the team had extensive gardening experience. He really took care of the plants and properly transplanted those that were "in the way". He also made sure that the plants were watered twice a day. The plants all look greener and happier now. 

Downspout water had to be directed to the drain and drain pipes had to be re-aligned.

The biggest change we did was to prep the garden for turf grass. We don't exactly know why the grass died, but we suspect it may be because of the bamboo and the soil. Maintaining grass is hard and expensive. You need to be really committed to maintain grass. I even tried growing grass to fill up the bald patches, but it didn't work. We decided to use turf grass so we can spend more time tending to growing plants. Also, no more muddy garden. 

Things are slowly taking shape. I'm really happy with how the refresh turned out. They added drains, realigned the pipes, fixed the downspout and even moved the faucet for me. The plants are also happier and we saw new bamboo growing after proper loam soil was added. We still need to finish the other mini-projects before we have the turf grass installed. 

Maybe I can finally start planting again :)

#BeKind #StaySafe